Saving You
by sandis86
Summary: What a surprise! Carol is pregnant again, but after she had the c-section with Kate it is totally risky to get another baby. What will she and Doug do now? Please r&r!
1. Chapter 1

**Saving You**

Chapter 1

_Doug,_

_I took the car today. Hope that's okay...I needed to go to the grocery store before work, too. _

_Your shorts are in the dryer, if you need them. They should be ready, when you wake up. Don't forget to pick up the twins at 3.30 from school ;)_

_Love you,_

_Care_

Doug smiled, reading this short note Carol left on the fridge. Too bad that she had to work this day; he'd love to spend time with her, but there was no chance to change his double shift. He came home about four in the morning and Carol was still sleeping. He was exhausted from work so he took just a small glimpse in the twins' room and went to bed too. Carol didn't even stir in her sleep when Doug came to bed, not even when he kissed her cheek. And then he couldn't even remember when he fell into a deep sleep, too.  
Waking up almost 10 hours after this he was fit again. He didn't even drink coffee, but instead he found a pin of Red Bull in the fridge. The short was in the dryer, Carol wrote. So she even washed the laundry this morning. Not bad, because he still had time to play some Basketball before he had to get the kids. Not a bad day, he thought.

* * *

Carol looked at her clock. Still four hours to go. It seemed that this day would never end. And she still hadn't had time for a break…  
A little girl interrupted her thoughts. "I cannot find my mommy," she said almost crying. Carol smiled at her, picking her up. "Can you tell me your name," she asked, trying to comfort the little girl with her smile. "My name is Grace!" the girl answered shyly. "That's a beautiful name, Grace!" Carol answered while she went to the admin desk with the little girl. Maybe her mother was a patient, maybe Sherry knew the girl.  
"Hey…there you are! I said you should wait here!" Sherry called when she saw Carol and Grace. Carol made big eyes. "Wow, I didn't know you have a daughter!" Sherry started to grin. "That's because she isn't my daughter. She's my niece and I'll bring her home now!" Sherry answered, picking up the little girl. "Sorry…y'know, she looks a lot like you!" Carol then said and turned around to get back to her work. Again she looked at her clock. "Damn…I need a break!" she thought.

* * *

"Hey daddy!" ten year old Tess smiled when she saw her dad, waiting outside the school. "Did you cook?" Kate asked, coming right behind her. "Hello to you too, Katherine. How was your day?" Doug answered smiling to his ten year old daughter. She was a very direct kid, not afraid of anything. Not much girly like. And she hated to be called Katherine. She preferred Kate a lot more. "Why don't you ask Theresa?" she said, looking annoyed to her dad. "Don't call my Theresa, silly!" Tess mocked at her sister. Kate just put out her tongue at her and they went away from the school to get to the underground station. "Stop it, kids. Look it's such a beautiful day today!" Doug just said, trying to calm the fighters down. "So, did you cook?" Kate asked again. Doug smiled. "No. We're going to get something on the way home!" he answered and the kids were happy with that because obviously Doug wasn't the best cook in the world.

* * *

Carol looked at her clock again; still one and a half hour to go. She still didn't get her break, which she needed more than ever. This was bugging her. She needed to find out. There were still a lot patients waiting. Carol shook her head and sighed. "Hey...what's going on?" Dr. Regan Pillsbury asked. She became Carol's best friend, since she came to Seattle. Carol looked at her shaking her head again. "This day is awful. Really. I really would need a little break. Just some minutes. But look at the waiting area!" Carol almost freaked out. Regan smiled at Carol. "Then go...take some minutes. I'm here!" "Thanks Reg. I'll be back soon!" Carol answered relieved and smiling.  
Finally she went to the toilet, not the public one, she used the private one. She pulled out the stripe without any thoughts. And then she waited.

* * *

"You know...the burgers at Richie's became a lot better since this new cook is there!" Tess mentioned while shoving fries into her mouth. Kate nodded, swallowing the last piece of her burger. "Totally! Remember our first visit here?" she laughed, remembering the bad taste of the food. Tess nodded smiling. "You two looked like a mess...but you were entertaining the whole restaurant!" Doug smiled, too. "We were babies, dad!" Kate answered. "Not babies. Five year olds are not babies, kiddo!" he said, stroking over Kate's curly head. He remembered everything back then and somehow he missed those times. He loved his girls very much but they were getting older, they almost were teenagers. He missed the little girls they once were, the silly games they played and their funny adventures they had. They spent time together now, too, but they changed. Life wasn't just fun anymore...Doug noticed that they slowly were on their way to become adults.

* * *

Oh no. This wasn't possible. That had to be a dream. She only needed to wake up. But she noticed that it wasn't a dream. It was reality. But no. No. No. NO! That couldn't be possible. Carol almost threw up when she noticed the two bright red stripes on the test. Once again she read the package. 'Please tell that blue is positive. Oh c'mon...' "Two red stripes mean a positive test."  
How was this possible? She was on the pill...and then she remembered.  
It had just been one night. One stupid night, when she forgot to take the pill. Instead, she was drinking wine with Doug and having fun. One stupid night.  
She wasn't supposed to get pregnant. Not now, not earlier, not in the future. Not what happened after the c-section she had with Kate. It was too risky. Slowly, tears formed in her eyes. Tears of fear but she also felt a little glimpse of happiness. Just a little.

* * *

"Daaaaaaaaaaaaad!"

Doug took a deep breath. The kids were fighting again while he tried to do his paperwork. "Don't you have homework?" he was shouting back. "A lot! But we need help! C'mon, help us!" Tess called from upstairs. "Pleaaaaaasee!" Kate finished. Doug closed his eyes. Normally, they didn't need help doing their homework. Why today? He stood up from the couch and went upstairs. "What's the problem?" he asked, taking a seat on Tess' bed. "Maths it is!" Tess answered, turning around to him and rolling her eyes. Well great. Doug wasn't the best in school, everybody knew that. He mostly did it with cheating. A little smile showed up on Doug's face. "What's so funny?" Kate asked looking at him weird. "Nothing...let's see..."

* * *

"Care? What...what's going on?" Regan asked when she found Carol still sitting in the corner of the bathroom, crying. Carol looked up at her, her eyes were red. "Look at that!" she just said, showing the pregnancy test to Regan. She took the stripe from Carol and looked at it with big eyes. "You're pregnant? Carol...that are wonderful news!" Regan smiled. Carol just shook her head. "No...it's not!" She started to cry again. She just didn't know what to do now. This just wasn't supposed to happen. Regan took a seat beside Carol and hugged her. "Why not? Why are you crying sweetie?"

Carol looked at her and then her tears stopped. "I can't have another baby. You know I had the c-section when I had Kate...she almost died...and I almost bled out...my OB told me that it was totally risky to get another baby...I...I don't know what to do!" When finishing her words the tears showed up again. "Care...you never know that. Maybe you should go home, talk with Doug!" Regan answered. Maybe that was the best idea.

* * *

"When is mum coming home?" Kate asked, realizing that Doug wasn't the best teacher. Doug shrugged. "In exactly...38 minutes her shift is over!" he answered looking at his watch. The girls' face lit up. "Yeah...I know she's better in this! Just let's wait until she comes home okay?" Doug said getting up from the bed. And then he saw the car pulling into the garage outside. She was here early...she never came home early...no, she always stayed longer in the hospital than she had to. Doug realized that something was wrong.

He went downstairs and out of the front door to see her. She got out of the car, taking a deep breath and turning around to him.

She looked terrible. Her face was frozen, her eyes red and swollen from the crying. And Doug's heart was beating like hell. He had never seen her like this. "Doug..." she started but the tears stopped her again. She just looked at him, waiting for him to hug her and never let go.  
He didn't wait a second to run to her, taking her into his arms, stroking her hair. "Hey...what happened? Please tell me. Care...everything will be alright...it will be okay!" he tried to calm her down. Carol just looked up to him, straight into his beautiful eyes, where she was lost. She kissed him through her tears, remembering how much she loved her husband and realizing that he was there for her. He always would be. He wouldn't let her go. When she stopped the kiss, she took his face into her hands, stroking over his cheeks. "What is it Care?"  
She looked down, biting her lip. Maybe this was just a dream.

"I'm pregnant..."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2 – Do you want to know a secret?**

Her words didn't go out of his head. "I'm pregnant! I'm pregnant! I'm pregnant!" He heard it over and over again.

He thought about it for a moment. A baby. What wonderful news. He would be a daddy again. How wonderful.

But also bad news. He knew the risks. Those damn risks. And Carol knew them, too. Her body was shaking, fear was in her eyes. Doug hugged her again, soaking in her scent, stroking her hair. "Everything will be okay babe. Let's go inside…we can talk about it later!" he suggested and she looked up to him. Nodding and showing a weak smile she kissed him again. "I love you!" she whispered, almost not believing that this wonderful man was her husband. "Love you, too!" he answered, taking her by the hand to lead her inside.

Carol went straight to the bedroom just to avoid the kids' questions. Her bed was a safe place now. She didn't even care that she was still wearing her coat and shoes…she only was thinking about the baby inside her, of its health and of her health. A single tear slipped out of her eye again. She always wanted to have more kids. She wished for nothing more. But was it worth it? Risking the pregnancy and lose the baby, or herself dying? She didn't want to miss any second of Tess' and Kate's life. And not any second of Doug's life.

"Hey…do you need anything? Are you hungry?" Doug asked standing at the door and interrupting Carol's thoughts. 'I need you, the twins and this baby' she wanted to say. "I just need you!" she said, without looking up to him.

Doug smiled a little. "I'll be right back!"

"Hey…what's going on with mum?" Tess asked when the twins were coming out of their room. "She isn't feeling well. I guess you have to wait with your homework then…" Doug answered, hoping they didn't notice how worried he was. "Ah, we finished it already. We're geniuses!" Kate answered smiling. "Yeah, you are…what are you doing now?" Doug asked. "Well…we wanted to ask if we're allowed to meet Tayler. She's got a new Nintendo Wii!" Kate said. Doug was relieved in that moment. He needed to talk with Carol. "That's okay!" he answered and the twins were happy. "But don't come home too late!" he called after them and just got "yeah, yeah" as an answer.

He went into the kitchen to get Carol some water, but instead of going to her he was just standing there leaned against the counter and looking down to his feet. He wanted to have this baby. And he didn't want to lose Carol. And he noticed that in this case everything was against the other.

When he came back to the bedroom she was still awake. She was lying there like a fallen angel, so beautiful but so sad. Doug loved this woman more than his life. He could never live without her.

Carol turned around when she noticed him. "Doug…" she whispered, not knowing what to do or what to say. He went to her, lying down beside her. "You told me the most wonderful news today, Care!" Doug said, imagining the life with a little baby again. He was happy on the one hand; happy as a father can be.

Carol looked at him. "Yeah...wonderful news..." she said, "but what am I going to do? Doug, you know..."

"Yeah, I know about the risks, Carol!" he finished her sentence. "But...what if nothing happens? What if everything will be okay? What if we get a healthy baby? What if you will be the healthiest pregnant woman ever?"

"What if the baby dies? What if I die, Doug?" she asked, finally spoken out the words that scared her the most.

"I'm not going to let that happen, Care!" Doug assured her. He would do everything to save her. He just wanted everything to be okay...but it wasn't okay at all. He knew that there was the possibility to lose both. And that feared him the most.

She saw it in his eyes that he was worried. This baby was the biggest wish she ever had. She would go through it with Doug, he would always be there. He wouldn't miss any ultrasound, he would feel the kicks in her stomach and he would help her in every step through her pregnancy. All the things he missed when she was pregnant with Tess and Kate. But on the other hand everything could go wrong. She could lose that baby which she so desperately wanted. She could leave Doug alone with the twins and the baby. Or only the twins.

"What do you want to do, Doug?" she finally asked. Maybe his decision would help her to find a decision.

"I want this baby...but..."

She noticed that he was thinking. "I can't have this baby, Doug!" she finally said, but this wasn't the answer she wanted to give. But it was the truth.

He couldn't believe that she was giving up this soon. She already made her decision, not compromising with Doug at all. "You're giving up?" he finally asked and Carol nodded. "I don't want to die...not yet..." she answered when a single tear rolled down her cheeks.

Doug couldn't stay with her at this moment and he got up from bed. He needed to go out of the room; he needed to get a clear head.

Carol looked after him when he left the room, not wanting him to go, to let her alone. She knew she hurt him with her decision. Was she wrong?

Doug through the ball through the basket and his mind was going crazy. He wanted this baby so much. It was his child. It was the child he would have with the woman he loved the most. It would be Tess' and Kate's sibling. And this baby shouldn't even get a name? No, her decision wasn't right; she was doing a mistake there. Doug knew that he could lose both, but there also was a chance that everything would go out okay. He would hate himself for not stopping her and never knowing if they would have a boy or a girl. He needed to stop her and convince her to get the baby. His child.

He turned around and suddenly she came out of the house, holding a hand over her stomach just to save the baby inside her from this cruel world. "Care...I..." he searched for the right words, but instead he cupped her chin to kiss her, to stop her crying, to save her.

She covered her face on his shoulder and the sobs began again. "I'm so sorry, Doug!" she said through her tears. He stepped away a little from her to look her in the eyes. "I don't want you to kill this baby...this is our baby, Care."

Carol just nodded, totally understanding what he meant. "I won't abort our baby, Doug. I can't. I already love it...so much..."

Doug was happy to hear that words. "So do I. We can do it. I'll be here. I won't let anything happen to you!" he said, finally smiling and thinking about the future. And finally Carol laughed too when he hugged her and twirled her around, like there would be no tomorrow. But, somewhere hidden in the back of their heads they were scared like hell. Scared, like there would be no tomorrow.

"What do you think is going on with mum?" Tess asked her sister when they were on their way back home. Kate shrugged. "No idea. Maybe the flu!" Tess nodded. "Well...I don't want to get sick. Winter holidays are on the way. Wouldn't be funny to lie in bed all the time when we have no school!" "Yeah, right. Wouldn't be funny at all!" Kate answered smiling. She was thinking about her mum since Doug told them that she wasn't feeling so good. "I hope she gets better soon!" she murmured and Tess nodded.

Finally they arrived at home, right in time before it started to snow. "We're back!" Tess called when she opened the door, but nobody answered. "Where are they?" Kate asked and Tess shrugged.

Tess went straight to the kitchen where she found Doug. He was sitting on a chair, holding a towel in his hands and looking out to nothing. "Hey dad...dad?" Tess asked when she went in front of him. Doug looked up. "Hm? Oh, hey Tess! How's it been?" he asked, standing up. "Good...fun...we could buy a Wii too!" she suggested and Doug smiled.

Kate found her mum in the living room, sitting on the couch with her feet up on the table. The TV wasn't on but Carol was starring at it. She didn't even recognize her daughter first; only when Kate took a seat beside her. "Mum? Are you okay?" Kate asked slowly and Carol looked at her with a weak smile. "I...I don't know if I am Kate!" she answered. "What do you mean?"

Carol sighed. "We have to tell you something important. Can you get dad and your sister?"

Kate turned her head. "Daaaaaad...TESS! Come here STAT!" she shouted and Carol let out a laugh. "I meant get them...not shout out your lungs!"

Seconds later Doug and Tess came to the living room together. Tess took a seat beside Kate and Doug went to sit beside Carol. He took her hand.

"What's going on?" Kate asked concerned. Carol looked to Doug...she didn't know how to tell them. Doug took a deep breath. "Tess, Kate...your mum is pregnant. A baby is on its way!"

As soon as she heard the news, Tess' face lit up. Her eyes were shining. But Kate...she still looked concerned. "Why aren't you happy?" she asked.

Now it was silent for some seconds. No one of them knew what to say. Carol looked down. "As you know I had a c-section when you were born" she said, looking to Kate. "And it was complicated..."

"You almost died!" Kate said and Carol nodded. "So did you...well, because of that...because my uterus is damaged, it is very risky to get another baby!"

Tess smile was gone. First she was so happy about the news...about having a little brother or a little sister. But now she saw the scared look on everybody's faces. This wasn't good at all. "You could die?" she asked silently. Carol nodded again. "So could the baby..."

When Kate felt the tears in her eyes, she suddenly stood up and ran out of the living room. "Kate!" Carol called after her, but then they heard the door of the twins' room slam. "I'm going to talk to her..." Carol said and got up.

"Tess...what do you think?" Doug asked then. "I don't know...this is all scary!" she answered smiling a little. "Yeah...totally! We're all scared a little! But we're also happy. We all have to work together...we have to be a team, to save mum and the baby!" Doug answered. Tess nodded. "Aren't we always?"

"Kate?" Carol found her daughter sobbing into her pillow. She took a seat on the bed and stroked Kate's back. "Don't cry, honey!" she said and Kate turned around. "Mum..." Kate sobbed and hugged her. "Oh please don't cry sweetie...everything will be okay!" Carol tried to calm her down, but her own tears came back. "That's all my fault!" Kate said. Carol wiped her tears away, shocked by Kate's statement. What was she thinking?

"Why are you thinking this, Kate?" Carol asked. "Because you almost died because of me!" her daughter answered. "Now...the baby..." Kate couldn't finish her sentence. "Oh Kate...don't you ever think that again! Nothing is your fault! It wasn't anybody's fault! Everything turned out okay, didn't it? Look at you...you're healthy and you're beautiful and I'm okay too!" Carol answered. Kate looked at her. "But, what if you die?" "I won't. I'm not going to let that happen. And you have to help me to do that. So does your dad and so does your sis. We have to fight...you've always been a fighter Kate...so help us fight now too!"

Kate smiled then. "Okay...I will!" she answered. "Are you happy, mum?" Carol nodded. "Very! Are you happy?" Kate nodded. She couldn't wait for her new sister or brother. "Yeah..."


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3 – Just like every other day**

Finally everyone was settled down again and they all had dinner together. But nobody of them seemed to be hungry; they all were just poking in their meal. Carol got uncomfortable. "C'mon guys…nobody died yet!" she joked but everyone looked at her shocked. "Sorry. It's just…Doug, we decided to have that baby, but I can't live on pretending something will happen!" she got loud. Doug smiled. "Are these the well-known hormones speaking now?" he asked and Carol smiled. "Maybe. But please let's pretend everything is okay, everything is fine…"

"But we're scared mum!" Kate answered looking at her. "Yeah…we don't want to lose you!" Tess stepped in. "And you're not going to…for the second time now!" Carol said and she took a bite of her bread but not really feeling like eating too. It was hard to pretend like she wanted to do, because everything wasn't okay and she knew that too.

"Will you get twins again?" Tess asked, laughing now. "That'd be fun!" Kate said and Doug shook his head. "That happens one time at one million pregnant women!" "Well, maybe mum is the one!" Kate said and Carol and Tess laughed. "Would that be bad?" Carol asked her husband. Doug laughed. "Wouldn't be bad!" he said, got up from his seat and kissed Carol on her cheek. "Four kids…" he chuckled and put his dish into the dishwasher.

* * *

"They sleeping?" Carol asked when Doug came back from the twins' room and she put her book away. "Yeah…" he answered and lay down beside Carol. He put his arm around her and soaked in her scent. "Kate was really worried today!" Carol said, stroking his hair. "I guess we all are a little bit worried!" Doug answered. "Yeah…I know. I'm going to see Jane tomorrow. See if everything is okay…" Carol said. "Good idea!" Doug answered. He thought about 10 years earlier, when Carol was pregnant with Tess and Kate. He missed everything back then. He didn't know when Carol was going to her OB to get an ultrasound. He didn't know when Carol felt the babies kicking in her stomach. He wasn't there when the twins took their first breath. And now he only waited for Carol to ask this one important question.

Carol looked at him and she knew that he had something on his mind. "Doug?" she asked and he looked up to her face. "Hm?" "You're coming with me, aren't you?" she asked silently, laying her hand on his cheek. Doug smiled. Finally she asked. "I won't miss it!" he said and she kissed him gently. This time everything would be different for them both. Carol wouldn't have to go through it alone. Doug would be there for her. All the time.

* * *

The next morning Carol woke up earlier than she wanted. She rubbed her eyes and yawned. What a bad dream. She still saw the dead baby in front of her. Thank God they were going to meet her OB…maybe the worries would get less afterwards. Carol turned around, but Doug was already gone. Then she looked at the alarm clock. It was only five in the morning; Doug's shift didn't start before 9. Where was he? Carol got out of the bed to look for him.

He was sitting on the couch, browsing through a book. When Carol looked closer, she noticed that it was the baby photo album of Tess and Kate. Carol smiled, seeing this. Doug was such a good dad and she thanked for every day he could spend with his daughters. She was happy that she made the decision to come here 10 years ago. She didn't regret any day. Sure it was hard the first time but they worked everything out. As a family.

Carol went downstairs and he turned around when he heard her. "Hey..." he whispered. "Hey!" she said, sitting down beside him. "They were beautiful, weren't they..." Carol said putting a finger over a pic of the babies. "Can you believe they turn 11 in two weeks?" Doug asked, putting a curl behind Carol's ear.

"It's hard to see them getting older...I still remember their baby scent!" Carol said smiling. "We'll have all that again Care!" Doug answered smiling at her. Carol nodded. "No sleep..." "Tons of diapers..." "Lot of crying..." "I can't wait to be there when all that happens Care...I just..." suddenly he wiped away a tear. "I just want everything to be okay...I can't live without you!"

Carol was overwhelmed by this. "Oh Doug..." she said, hugging him and kissing his neck and cheek. "I love you...so much!" Her mouth touched his. "I don't wanna talk about death anymore. But when these nine months are over, I'm going to castrate you!" Now both laughed and Doug kissed her again. "Ouch..." he murmured. "Let's go back to bed now...for some hours, okay?" Carol suggested and Doug agreed with that.

* * *

Two hours later the twins woke up by the alarm clock. "Oh maaaan..." Kate yawned. "Dammit! When are the holidays again?" Tess jumped up from her sleeping position. "Thanks Katherine. With your shouting I'm fully awake now!" she said and got up. "Katherine..." Kate murmured, turning her eyes and getting up, too. "Bathroom's mine!" she shouted and with that she was running out of the room. "Great, sis!" Tess answered to herself.

Carol opened her eyes, when she heard the twins' shouting. Doug cuddled her and she almost didn't get out of his hands. When she finally managed to get up, he didn't even stir in his sleep. Smiling, she went out of the bedroom, down to the kitchen to make fresh coffee. "Oh great..." she suddenly said, "no coffee for me now...well, for the next nine months!" Turning her eyes she looked in the cupboards for decaf or something like that. All she found was muesli and cacao. "Yay, kids breakfast for me! Awesome!" She remembered surviving fifteen months without caffeine, without alcohol, but also how hard it was. She always was tired and there was nothing she could do against it.

„Kaaaaate! Hurry up!" Tess was shouting. Her sister was still blocking the upper bathroom. Carol rolled her eyes. The girls already were fighting about the bathroom. Some years from now there would be three of them. "Nobody is in the bathroom down here, Tess!" Carol shouted up and Tess finally ran down. "Mornin' mum!" she said and then she disappeared in the room. "Yeah…good morning to you, too…" Carol murmured, taking a sip from her hot cacao. She made a face, never really liking cacao when suddenly Doug hugged her from behind. "Morning, sweetheart!" he whispered, kissing her ear and her cheek. Carol smiled. She turned around to kiss him on the mouth. "Morning, babe!" she answered, "we need to hurry up, but our children are blocking the bathrooms!"

Doug got himself a cup of coffee. "Already? What are they doing? Putting up make-up or what?" he asked, shaking his head. Carol only looked at his cup. The smell of the coffee was so good. "That's so unfair…" she murmured and Doug laughed. "Nine months, huh?" he asked and she showed his tongue to him.

* * *

An hour later the kids were in the school bus and Doug and Carol were on the way to the hospital. "I'm getting nervous…" Carol said, looking out of the car. "Everything will be fine, Carol!" Doug answered, concentrating on the street, but when Carol looked at him, she knew he was concerned too. She only nodded, looking out of the window again. How should they go through these nine months, always being worried that something could happen? This was killing her too. She needed to get happy news for that pregnancy, but right now there were only just worries.

She saw Dr. Coburn in front of her and then the blood she lost, Dr. Coburn's words one day after the birth of the twins. "This was very risky, Carol. You need to be sure if you want to get more kids. I wouldn't if I was you..."

Carol was crying for about an hour after that. Not only because of Dr. Coburn's words, but also because she wasn't sure if she would ever get the chance to have more kids. Doug wasn't there and she didn't know if he'd ever be. And she only wanted to give birth to Doug's children. No other man would be the daddy of her kids.

After their marriage, Doug and Carol talked about having another baby. Tess and Kate were three at this time. Actually, it was Carol who brought up that topic. "You know...I'd love to have another baby with you!" she said to Doug, looking in his eyes and stroking his cheek. "Oh really?" he asked smiling, "I'd love that too!" He kissed her then but Carol stepped away. "You know I can't..." she said sadly. Doug nodded. "I know. We have Tess and Kate and I'm really happy that they're our beautiful, healthy daughters!" was his answer. Both smiled then, but both sad that this topic was over as soon as it began.

When they arrived at the hospital, Doug went straight to the lounge but Regan stopped Carol in front of it. "Did you tell him?" she asked and Carol nodded. "Of course I told him. We decided to keep it…but this all is so crazy, so hard!" Carol answered, taking a deep breath. "What's hard?" Sherry asked, coming from a patient. Carol didn't want to spoil the news yet. It was too early. "No coffee in the house this morning!" Carol lied. Sherry just shrugged and went away again.

Regan smiled, happy about Carol's and Doug's decision. "I'll be there for you both, Care. You're not alone on this!" Carol nodded. "Thanks, Reg!" She was so happy to have her as a friend. "I'm going to see Jane today; maybe she can do an ultrasound already. I know it's early, but…it's been almost eleven years…" again she hesitated a little. Eleven years ago she almost had a hysterectomy. Eleven years ago she almost bled out. Eleven years were a long time…her uterus had a long time to recover. "How are you feeling? I mean, not psychical; do you have morning sickness? Cramps? Anything?" Regan asked. Carol shook her head. "Nothing. I'm feeling like always!" "See, that's a good sign, isn't it! Tell me what Jane said, okay?" Regan asked, smiling at Carol. "I will…" Carol murmured, following Doug to the lounge.

* * *

"Here's your baby!" Dr. Jane Ryan said excited, showing the tiny living being on the screen. Doug's face lit up. This was the first sight of his baby. He had seen so many ultrasounds before but this one was special. This one showed his and Carol's baby. It needed to be okay; he so desperately wanted it. "Is it okay?" Carol asked concerned. "Everything looks normal for me right now, but…" she wiped away the slippery substance from Carol's belly, "do you really want to go through this? Have you thought about it?"

Carol looked to Doug and she had never seen him happier before. "We want to go through this, but the problem is my uterus, you know that. What can I do?" Carol answered, louder than she wanted.

Jane took a deep breath. "You're about 8 weeks now. Did you have any problems until now?" she asked. Carol shook her head. "Everything's fine." "Okay then. That's good. But there are nine months ahead of you. You need to visit me every week. You should stop working for now. You shouldn't do hard work. You aren't allowed to carry heavy things", Jane told her and Carol nodded. This didn't sound so hard. "Am I allowed to have…" she wanted to ask, but Jane interrupted her. "Sex? I guess there's no problem with that. I don't want to take you both the fun away!" Jane laughed and Carol smiled to Doug. "It's going to be full of risk. I want to tell the truth…this is about life and death. When something goes wrong, when the baby needs too much blood, it could kill you!" Jane said, getting serious again. "We know that…but we want to try it!" Doug said, squeezing Carol's hand. "Well then…good luck and congratulations to both of you!" Jane answered, understanding their decision, but concerned if this was the right one.


	4. Chapter 4

_**AN:**__Thanks for all your lovely reviews! Here comes the next chapter!_

**Chapter 4 – Complications**

"So, what did Jane say?" Regan asked when she saw Doug and Carol coming down from Jane's ordination. "We're allowed to have sex!" Carol joked, but somehow she was annoyed. "Well that's great news…but what's bothering you?" Regan asked. "She isn't allowed to work anymore. She isn't allowed to do anything…that's the problem, right?" Doug asked his wife. Carol looked at him with a fake smile. "You know I love my work…" she murmured. "What's more important to you? Work or your baby?" Regan asked again, putting her hands on her hips. "I asked her the same…didn't get an answer!" Doug mentioned, looking to Carol. She just rolled her eyes. "Reg…when's your shift over?" she asked instead. "1 hour ago! Why?" Regan asked. "I want to have an ice cream!" Carol said smiling. "It's November babe!" Doug laughed. Carol shook her head. "I'm pregnant! I want ice cream, now!"

"You're what?" Sherry asked who just went by. Carol turned around shocked. "Sherry…" she smiled. "You're pregnant?" Sherry asked again, looking between Carol and Doug. "Surprise…" Regan said embarrassed. Doug just laughed. "Yes, I am. But nobody needs to know it that soon. I'm only eight weeks. Please don't tell anybody…" Carol said silently now. Sherry just smiled and nodded. "Congratulations, then!" she said, smiling to Doug and went away. Carol rolled her eyes, knowing exactly what look that was. Regan looked to Carol, knowing exactly was she was thinking. "I can't come with you…I've got a date tonight!" Regan said excited. Carol looked at her with big eyes. "We'll talk tomorrow!" Regan said and with that, she was gone.

It had never been a secret that Sherry wanted something from Doug. Carol noticed it as soon as she entered this hospital. It were the looks that Sherry was giving Doug and how she was speaking with him. This didn't even change when Doug and Carol had their wedding.

Carol just shook her head on her thoughts and they went to get a sundae.

Doug and Carol took a spot in the left corner of the restaurant and took a seat. "Care…" Doug started but Carol interrupted him. "I don't get her. Really…what is she thinking? We're married for seven years now…" "What are you talking about?" Doug asked. Carol looked at him, really not believing that he didn't know what she was talking about. Doug laughed. "You're talking about Sherry?" he asked and Carol nodded. "She's crazy!" Doug mentioned. "I don't need to get worried?" Carol asked. Doug looked at her in disbelief. "You didn't ask me that right now, did you?" he said, not changing his facial expression. Carol wasn't sure if she was or had to be worried about Sherry. Sherry and Doug. If she would die, which she wasn't going to be, he would be free for her. And yes, she was jealous. She had the most wonderful husband in the world. The most beautiful man on the world. The best father to her children in the world. Of course she was jealous.

Sherry was a beautiful woman. Long legs; straight, brown, long hair. Carol thought she looked like the girls on the magazines, only a little bit older. Carol thought that Sherry was exactly Doug's type. But why was she so concerned, after all this years together and seven years of marriage? Maybe because she missed one year in Doug's life here in Seattle. She had no idea how he was living then, what he was doing, his friends, and his closer friends. Sherry. What about her? How often was she trying to speak with Doug, smiling at him with her beautiful white teeth, throwing back her head and letting her hair fly. She reminded Carol a little bit of Linda Farrell, who was together with Doug back in Chicago, many years ago.

Carol looked to Doug, who was still watching her. She smiled. "I don't like it, when she tries to steal my husband!" She chuckled when he shook his head with a smile. Doug took her hand in his. "She isn't stealing me way from you, babe. Nobody is", he answered and then he kissed her, proving that she was the only one for him. "I love you. Only you. And you know that, don't you?" he asked, looking into her eyes. Carol smiled and nodded.

Her heart was skipping a beat like it always did, when he told her that he loved her. Even after all this years she was so much in love with him. And she would do anything for him, even putting her life at risk with getting this baby. "I love you, too!" she finally said, knowing that he'd never cheat on her, never again.

"You're not doing this only for me, are you?" Doug asked, putting his hand on her stomach. He was so concerned about this; he wanted this baby but did she too?

"What? Of course not!" she said, shaking her head a little bit. "I mean…I love that you're here from the beginning…you missed everything when I was pregnant with the twins. But…I love this baby, too. When I first said that I can't have it I was…scared. I'm still scared, but I'm happy now. I know it will be hard to do nothing…but I want this baby to be healthy and I want to see growing it up, so it's okay for me to stay away from work, if it safes my life and the baby's life!" She smiled then and so did Doug, both knowing that this baby was made out of love.

"Kids! We're home!" Carol called when she and Doug came home from the café. Carol went to the kitchen to put the ice cream she brought with her in cups for the kids and one extra for her, again. 'Oh man, I'm only eight weeks and eating like a pig already' she thought when she carried the cups into the living room. Doug laughed. "Don't laugh!" Carol said, sitting down and shoving ice cream into her mouth. "That's so good!"

"You're beautiful!" Doug said now, watching her. He was so happy. "Wait until I get fat!" Carol answered smiling and kissing his cheek.

"Yeah...I smelled it!" Kate said excited and shoved the spoon into her mouth. "You're welcome! Enjoy it! Where's your sister?" Carol asked. "She's sleeping...not feeling well!" Kate said with her mouth full of ice cream. "What? Since when?" Doug asked concerned. "She was feeling sick in school and when we came home she went to sleep...she's sleeping since then!" Kate answered.

"Oh no...Not the flu!" Carol moaned. "I'm going to look after her!" Doug said and got up.

"So, how's the baby?" Kate asked and Carol smiled. "Teeny tiny! Wanna see a pic?" Carol asked and Kate nodded. "Yeah...show me!"

Carol looked in her bag where she put the picture of the ultrasound. Finally she found it between the vitamins and medication she got. She gave it to Kate. "Wow...that doesn't look like a baby..." Kate said, studying the picture. Carol laughed. "It's too early...it will look like a baby when I'm at eight months!" she answered. "Okay, show me a picture then!" Kate said, eating her ice cream again. Carol watched her daughter and nodded. "I love you...I love you and your sister so much, you know that, right?" she said, smiling to her younger daughter, which she almost lost ten, almost eleven years ago. "Aww...we love you too, mommy!" Kate then said, hugging her mother like she never wanted to let go of her.

"Carol! I think we need to get to the hospital!" Doug called from upstairs and Carol let go from Kate. She hesitated. "What?" She looked up to the stairs. "Tess is heating up. She has pain. I think it's the kidneys! We need to go!" Doug called again and Carol wanted to get up. But then...it was exactly the same like when she discovered her first pregnancy. She was dizzy, her head spun. She had to sit down again...but still everything was turning around her. "Mum?" Kate asked concerned and also Doug ran to her. "Care...what's going on?" He touched her face, stroking back her curls. "It's...nothing, I just got up too quickly!" Carol answered, still breathing quicker than normal. "You should stay at home...I'll go with Tess!" Doug said and he got up again.

"Dammit Doug! She's my daughter! I'm pregnant, not sick!" she answered annoyed and Kate backed away from her. Carol closed her eyes. "Sorry...I'm sorry!" she started to cry, "Let's just go all together, okay? I wanna be with her, too!" Doug nodded. "Okay then. Tess is already getting ready!"

The pediatrician Dr. Small, who was also a colleague from Doug, punched Tess lightly in her kidneys. "Aaaaaahh" she cried out loud, her face showed how much pain she had. "Sorry Tess…Clearly the kidneys. I assume it's pyelitis, but we need some tests to be sure. First, we need an urine sample!" Dr. Small said and smiled to Tess. "But I can't…it hurts so much!" Tess cried again. "Can't she have something against the pain?" Carol asked, going up and down in the room. She was worried because she never saw her daughter like this. "Don't worry; she'll get antibiotics and Ibuprofen for now. She'll be okay in a couple of days!" Dr. Small said and wrote something in the chart. "And now you have to pee in that cup, can you do that for me?" he asked looking to Tess. Tess just closed her eyes and the tears fell down her cheek. Finally she nodded. She wanted to be strong, she wanted to be a fighter but somewhere behind in her head she was thinking that she had to die. The pain was so strong, her temperature was incredible high and her head was glowing.

Doug looked to Carol. "You need to calm down. Everything will be okay!" he said and stopped her. She looked to him and he could see the fear in her eyes. This was killing her. "I know" Doug said, reading her mind, "We're here to help her. She will be okay, I promise!"

Carol nodded and hugged Doug, knowing she needed to calm down, for her, for Tess and the baby inside her. She looked to her daughter who was lying on the hospital bed. "Sweetie…do you think you can go to the toilet?" she asked and Tess opened her eyes. "Are you coming with me?" Tess asked and Carol nodded. "Of course! C'mon, I'll help you up!" Carol went to the bed and helped Tess out of it. Doug looked at her concerned. That was exactly what she wasn't allowed to do. But he also knew that he couldn't stop her. "I'm staying with Kate!" he said instead, taking a seat beside his younger daughter. "She has a bad timing…" Kate murmured a little bit mad at her sister that she had to get sick when the holidays were in one week. "You can't choose the timing!" Doug answered smiling. Kate nodded. "Hope she's better in a week then!"

And suddenly they heard Tess' crying. "!"

Doug and Kate jumped up and ran out to the corridor where they saw Tess standing beside her mother, who was lying on the floor, her eyes closed. "My God…what happened?" Doug asked and ran to Carol. Kate couldn't move her feet, her heart was beating like hell. "She felt dizzy…and suddenly she fell!" Tess cried. "Oh no…no, no, no! Care…wake up!" Doug said, touching her cheeks. "I'm so sorry, dad! I'm sorry!" Tess said and she covered her mouth with her hand. Doug looked to his daughter. "It's not your fault Tess! It's not your fault!" he answered calmly. "Go back to bed, will you? And Kate?" he asked, turning around to her. "Can you please get Dr. Small? I need some help here!" Kate didn't say anything but she still looked at him with big, scared eyes. "GO!" Doug shouted now, losing his temper. This wasn't happening. This was just a bad dream. He promised that nothing will happen to her. He promised it…

"She isn't allowed to do this, Doug!" Jane said as she came out of Carol's hospital room. He was sitting in a chair, waiting and his head in his hands. "I know". "Really. It's forbidden. If you want to have this baby, then you need to take that serious. I'm not kidding. Today was the first sign that this is totally risky!" Jane said, taking a seat beside him. "For me it's serious. I said she should stay at home with Kate. She didn't listen to me!" Doug answered, looking to his friend now. Jane nodded. "Yeah…I know Carol, she's stubborn. I'll talk to her about it later!" she said and she got up again. "Jane?" Doug asked and she looked at him. "What happened?" "Her stress is stress for the baby too. When the baby is stressed, it needs more blood from its mother. And Carol hasn't got a lot of extra blood for the baby. That's what happened!" the doctor answered. "The baby..." Doug started but Jane cut him off: "is okay. So is Carol. She just needs to rest. For the rest of the nine months!" Doug nodded, finally getting up and going into Carol's room.

She opened her eyes when he entered the room. "Doug…" she whispered and a single tear rolled down her cheek. "Hey babe!" he said, taking a seat beside her hospital bed and kissing

her fingers. "You scared the hell out of me!"

"I'm sorry…I know I was stupid!" Carol said, smiling a little. "You're not stupid. You're a caring mother!" Doug answered, smiling back. "How's Tess doing?" she then asked. "Better. She already got an IV and is getting her antibiotics already. The tests showed that it is pyelitis and she also has to drink that awful tea now. But she's with Kate now and already having fun!" Doug told her.

"I can't believe it's two of us in a hospital bed now!" Carol said. "It doesn't have to be two!" Doug answered, looking down to his feet. "I know and I'm sorry. I'm just not used to do nothing…and when I saw my daughter in pain I just let it go!" she answered.

Doug nodded, knowing exactly what she meant. But Carol had a baby inside of her which could die and she could die and…this was going to be the hardest nine months ever.

"It's serious, Carol!" Jane said when she heard Carol's words and she entered the room. Carol looked up at her friend and then she saw the concerned look on her face. "I'm okay…I just felt dizzy!" Carol now said, louder than she wanted. "That doesn't matter. What happened today was just a little glimpse of the big explosion that could be. I really think you're taking this too easy!" Jane said, sitting down and taking Carol's hand. "I'm talking to you as your friend. Please listen to me…we don't want to lose you or the baby. Doug is here to help you; you're not alone with this. We all will help you, if it's necessary!"

Carol felt the tears running down her cheeks. She could count herself lucky that she had her husband and such good friends. And she realized that she really needed to step down, from everything. "Thanks…for everything. And I promise that I will take this seriously!" she answered and then looked to Doug, "I promise!"

When Doug came back to Tess' room, both she and Kate were sleeping. Doug was tired too because he wasn't sleeping since yesterday, but he just couldn't close his eyes. He had too many emotions running through his head, not able to shake them off.

Today, when he saw Carol lying on that floor, pale as a ghost, he thought he would lose her forever. He just wasn't prepared for this but now he realized that this pregnancy really was serious. Was it the wrong decision to get the baby?

No. He shook this thought off. Other women did it too. Other women survived this perfectly, with a beautiful baby. So, why couldn't Carol?

"Daddy?" Tess suddenly interrupted his thoughts. He looked to her and smiled. "How's mum?" she whispered. "She's okay. How are you doing, sweetie?" he asked, looking up everything in her chart. Tess rolled her eyes. "It sucks to be here!" she whined and Doug smiled. "You'll be okay in some days. And then you can relax at home because…NO SCHOOL!" "Yay!" Tess smiled then, happy that she didn't have to go to school anymore. "That's totally unfair, sister!" Kate said when she woke up. "I wanna stay at home, too! I have temperature…I feel it!" Doug laughed. "Nice try, Katherine!" he answered and his daughter rolled her eyes.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5 – News**

After Carol was released from the hospital and all the formalities of her maternity leave were done she spent her first day at home alone. Tess recovered really quickly and she was back to school with Kate. Doug had a double shift again and she was bored. Thank God that the school holidays started in some days so she would have company from her daughters.

Carol knew that she wasn't allowed to do work, but she just couldn't do nothing. So she decided to cook dinner…this wasn't really work and they needed to have something to eat. When she was ready with cooking she went into the living room, stretching her out on the couch and she closed her eyes. This was just the first day at home and already she didn't know what to do. She wasn't even allowed to clean the house.

She shook her head and let out a deep breath. "This will be the most boring nine months in my life…" she murmured when she got up to get her laptop. She checked her mails but all she got was just spam. Not very interesting either. But then she had an idea. "Let's write a mail to Chicago!" she said loud to herself, remembering that they didn't write Haleh for a long time.

"_Dear Haleh,_

_It really has been a long time since we wrote. So, how are you doing? Are you still slogging in County?_

_Last May we had visitors from County here. I think their names were Dr. Rasgotra and nurse Taggart, they were here for an organ donation. Doug got to talk with them about County but they found out that not many of our friends are there anymore. Too bad I had so much to do; I'd have loved to talk with them about our old work place._

_Have you heard about Susan? Her last mail told that she wanted to visit Chicago again. I think I have to write her too, to find out how she's and her family is doing. Cosmo must be a beautiful little boy now! _

_Talking about kids, some days ago I found out that I'm pregnant again! We're all really happy but also scared a lot, since it's a high-risk pregnancy. But Doug and I decided to get the baby and to go through it. Tess and Kate can't wait to meet their new sibling; can you imagine how happy they are?_

_Tess and I have been in the hospital the last few days. Tess got sick and they diagnosed a pyelitis. She was in so much pain and I just couldn't see her like that, but my help brought me in a hospital bed, too. I collapsed and they found out that the baby inside me needs too much blood. So now, I stopped working and am at home now, not allowed to do hard work. That's really boring; you know that I'm a work person, don't you?_

_But now enough from us; do you have any news for us? Maybe we'll get the chance to talk in person again when we're visiting Chicago on Christmas. Hope to meet you in County then._

_Hope to hear from you soon!_

_Many kisses,_

_Carol"_

Satisfied with her mail she clicked on the send button and shut down her laptop again. She felt really tired now, so she decided to have a power napping.

This wouldn't have been so hard if the telephone didn't wake her. Rolling her eyes she got up and saw Regan's number on her display. "Hey Reg! What's up?" she said, sitting down on the couch again.

"Well…I just wanted to ask how you are!"

"Are you checking on me?" Carol asked, knowing exactly that this was Doug's idea.

"No, I'm not! But you know…your husband is driving me crazy here! Talking about you all the time…asking if I already have called you…" Regan answered smiling.

Carol smiled too, thinking about how nervous Doug was.

"He's crazy…and it's only my first day at home! How will you survive this for the next months?"

"I have no idea but…could you call him or anything?" Regan asked.

"Of course. Thanks for you call!" Carol answered smiling again.

"No problem. Take care of yourself!" Regan answered and they both hung up.

Carol lay back on the couch again and she had to laugh because of Doug. He was so worried, but Carol thought that this was really sweet. She looked on the clock. In three hours she had to get the twins from school. There was still time to go out of the house…

"Hey…what are you doing here?" Regan asked when she saw Carol entering the hospital. "Visiting! Rescuing you from my husband!" Carol laughed putting her coat off. "Thank God", Regan answered, "look at you…you look beautiful!"

Carol rolled her eyes. "Please…I'm only gone for one day! So…where's Doug?"

"Try his office room! He said he wanted to do some paper work!" Regan answered and Carol nodded.

She found Doug in his office, the charts were on his desk but he was just looking out of the window. "What's so interesting out there?" Carol asked and he turned around surprised. "Heyyy…what are you doing here?" he asked and stood up to hug and kiss her. "Well…I heard that you're really miserable without me!" Carol smiled. "I'm not…okay, a little bit!" he answered, kissing her again. "Believe me…I already miss it too! But…this was just my first day at home, so you have to get used to it!" Carol answered, stroking her finger over his cheek. "I know. I won't bother Regan again! I'm…I'm just worried!" Doug said. "Don't be. I'm fine. I didn't do anything today except cooking dinner!" she answered smiling. "Good girl!"

"Doug…we need you in about 4 minutes! MVA coming in!" Sherry said, storming into his office. Carol backed away from him. "Alright. I'm coming!" Doug answered and Sherry leaved the office smiling. "Did she forget how to knock?" Carol asked annoyed. Doug smiled and hugged her again. "I love you" he just said and kissed her again. Carol closed her eyes and smiled too. "Love you, too!" she answered and then she left the room.

"Hey, what are you doing now?" Regan asked when she saw Carol leaving. "Don't know; still an hour until I have to get the kids!" Carol answered looking on her watch. "Wanna grab a coffee?" Regan asked. Carol smiled. "I'd do everything for a cup of coffee!" she answered. "One can't be so bad! Let's go!" Regan said while putting her coat on and they left the hospital.

"I thought a MVA was coming in!" Doug said coming to the admin desk. "False alarm…I'm sorry I disturbed you!" Sherry answered, looking up from the computer to smile at him. Doug didn't say anything. He wanted to turn around but then he stopped. "Do you have a problem with Carol?" he asked and with that he totally caught Sherry by surprise. She hesitated. "What?" she asked shocked. "I asked if you have a problem with Carol. Every time she's around you behave weird!"

Sherry laughed then. "That's insane, Doug!" she answered, concentration on her computer work again. "I'm not sure about that", Doug answered, "but you have to stop your intention!" He chuckled and left her with an open mouth.

"Ugh…what a day! You know, you should be lucky you don't have to work!" Regan said when they sat down. Carol looked at her with a furrowed brow. Regan smiled. "I know you love your work. And you'll be back as soon as possible!"

Carol nodded. "Hopefully. I hate not to know what's going on!" "What's going on with Sherry?" Regan asked, knowing Carol's fears exactly. Carol nodded. "Forget Sherry!" Regan said. "She's crazy…what is she thinking?" Carol answered shaking her head. "Care…it doesn't matter what she's thinking! You're married with Doug for what…seven years! You have two beautiful twin daughters together and another baby is on its way!" Regan said smiling. "Sounds like a fairytale!" Carol answered, smiling too. "And in every fairytale there's a bad bitch…sorry, witch…and in your case that's Sherry!" Regan answered laughing. Carol rolled her eyes at Regan's comment. "Hey Reg…how was your date? We didn't get the chance to talk!" Carol finally asked. Regan smiled; she looked happy.

"Carol…Connor is awesome. Beautiful. Funny. He's handsome. We've been at a restaurant, afterwards in a bar and then we went home in my apartment!" Regan told with shining eyes. "You already had sex with him?" Carol whispered unbelieving, but then remembering her first date with Doug and she had to smile. "Forget it. I totally understand", she finished, "will you see him again?"

Regan nodded smiling. "Of course! Did I tell you that he's an attorney? He's wearing suits all the time!" Carol noticed that Regan was totally in love. "Reg…I really, really, really wish that this works out for you. You deserve it!" Carol said, taking Regan's hand. "Oh…you're so sweet! But you know there is no second Doug and Carol fairytale!" Regan answered smiling and Carol rolled her eyes. "Our relationship wasn't always a fairytale…" Regan shook her head. "I don't believe you!" she laughed. "Believe me!" Carol answered, remembering how hard it had been the first time.

Half an hour later and after two cups of coffee, Carol looked at her watch. "Oh…I need to get the twins from school!" she said and Regan nodded. "Go! I'll pay for the coffee! And I'll call you!" she answered. Carol got up. "Thanks, it was delicious," she smiled, "talk to you later!" She waved her hand and then hurried out of the coffee shop.

"Hey girls! Only one day left, huh?" Carol said as her daughters ran out of the school building. "Yeah…but it'll be only four days, since it's only Thanksgiving!" Tess mentioned. Carol rolled her eyes. Her daughters really hated school. "You should be happy that you get those four days! And, it's your birthday, too!" she answered. "Do you already have presents for us?" Kate asked smiling and looking with big eyes to her mother. "Are presents that important?" Carol asked. "YES!" Tess and Kate shouted out happily.

Finally they arrived at home and Carol fell back on the couch. "Please get you something to eat…everything's in the kitchen!" she called, too lazy to get up. And then she saw the sign of a new mail on her laptop. She smiled, hoping that it was an answer from Haleh.

"_Sweetie,_

_It's so good to hear from you again! Thanks for your email! And many congratulations to your pregnancy, this is really great. We always thought that you should get more kids because Doug and you make beautiful kids! I wish you a lot of luck, power and patience for the rest of your pregnancy but I guess you get a lot of help from your husband and your beautiful twin daughters!_

_Well yes, I still work at County and it's crazy as always; you know how it's going on around here. And oh, what a surprise! Neela and Sam didn't tell anything about meeting you! I can't believe that it was you who saved a mother's life! And apparently you also saved Carter's life!_

_Sam told me that they brought a kidney to another hospital and we almost forgot about it, but when Cater came back to County he told that he had kidney transplantation and he got to know that the kidney came from a boy from Seattle. How small is the world? Did you know about this? That's so exciting!_

_Susan was here in Chicago when Carter opened the Joshua Carter Center. Also Elizabeth, Peter and Kerry were here. Too bad that you weren't here, it was really a great party and good to see all of our old stuff again. I guess Susan still has her old email address but maybe I'm wrong._

_Okay, I think that's all about the news here and I can't wait to see you all again. Please show up in County when you're visiting on Christmas (and I mean all of your family, that means: also Doug!)_

_And I know that it's Tess' and Kate's birthday in three days, so I wish them a Happy 11__th__ Birthday!_

_Take care of you, honey!_

_Many wishes,_

_Haleh"_

Carol covered her open mouth with her hand. Doug and her saved Carter's life.

_**AN**__: They finally found out about Carter! Isn't his great?_

_Hope you're all enjoying this as much as I do ;) Thanks for your great reviews! Love, Sandy_


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6 – Happy Birthday****, Babies**

She couldn't believe what she just read. Suddenly, this one whole day went by in front of her. How young Billy came in, hit by a car. His grandmother, crying, not believing that her only grandson was brain dead. How tired Doug was because of his double shift, but still joking about spelling tests. How they talked Billy's grandmother into donation his organs.

How Cindy called her late at night, telling her that the heart went to a mother and the kidneys to some doctor. Some doctor. Now she knew who the doctor was. Really not bad for a day's work.

Smiling she got her cell phone. She needed to call Doug, tell him the news. It rang about four times and Carol noticed that he didn't have time to go to his phone. She sighed because she really wanted to share this news…but hey, he would come home next morning, so she just needed to wait longer. Happy and with a huge smile on her face she went to her daughters.

* * *

"Hey, it's time to go to bed!" Carol said when she found the twins watching TV in the living room, after she took a hot bath. Tess and Kate whined, not wanting to go to bed that early. "C'mon, it's the last day of school before Thanksgiving! You can stay up longer tomorrow!" Carol said turning the TV off. Tess and Kate sighed. "Okay…fine!" Kate answered. "Did you brush your teeth?" Carol asked and her daughters rolled their eyes. "No, but we're going!" Tess answered, slightly annoyed.

Carol followed them into the bathroom. "Do you remember Dr. Carter?" she asked. She just needed to let her happiness out. "From Chicago?" Tess asked, turning around to her mum. Carol nodded. "We didn't see him the last time when we were in Chicago!" "Because we only visited our grandmothers!" Kate added. Carol nodded. "Yeah, right. Well, your dad and I saved his life, I guess!" Carol answered smiling. "In Chicago?" Kate asked with the toothbrush in her mouth. Carol laughed. "No…last May a boy in the hospital was brain dead and his kidney went to Carter!" she told. "Oh, cool!" Tess and Kate said, not very interested in the news. Carol sighed. "Wanna sleep in my bed tonight?" she then asked, not wanting to sleep alone in the big bed. The kids' eyes lit up. "Yeah!" "Thanks mommy!"

"So…are you excited about your birthday?" Carol asked, when all three of them were tucked in bed. "Hm…a little bit…" Kate answered, not sounding really happy about it. Carol knew that it was hard for them not to have a party this year but she just couldn't stand through a party with wild, running and screaming kids. "I'm sorry about the party…" Carol whispered, kissing Tess' and Kate's head. "It's okay, mum!" Tess answered understanding the reasons. "11 years, huh", Carol said, "You're becoming adults slowly!" Kate smiled. "Can't wait to go out and meet boys!" she said looking excited. "What?" Carol laughed. She knew that the twins wouldn't have a problem to get a boyfriend with their looking, but already thinking about this now? "All the girls in senior high do it!" Tess explained. "Oh, I see! So, do you like a boy from your school?" Carol asked again. "Well, I think Brad Cooper is really cool!" Kate said. "Yeah…he's cool!" Tess said smiling. Carol almost started to cry…her babies were talking about boys and going out. She couldn't believe how quickly they grew up. "Please try to be kids as long as you can!" she said then, kissing them both again. "I love you both!"

* * *

"Wanna go by bus today?" Carol asked her daughters the next morning when they were sitting at the breakfast table. "Why not…" the twins answered, eating the rest of their cornflakes. Then they got up taking their rucksacks and putting on their coats and caps. "See you later, mum!" both called and waved their mum goodbye. "Have fun on your last day!" Carol called back and then they were out of the house.

Carol yawned; she was tired from doing nothing. She couldn't wait for Doug to come home because she still didn't tell him the news from Carter.

When she finally heard him pulling into the garage she went to the door to meet him there.

"Oh man…I missed you so much!" Doug said when he went to her. He put his bag down and kissed her passionately. "Mhm…" Carol murmured, not able to speak through his kiss. His tongue searched hers and he opened the door without stopping to kiss her. Carol chuckled. "I love you!" he said. "Bedroom?" Carol asked smiling and he nodded. Picking her up, they disappeared behind the door of their bedroom.

"You really did miss me, didn't you?" Carol laughed, making herself comfortable in his arms. "Totally! Thank God I got the next few days off!" Doug answered playing with one of her curls. "I'm glad too…it gets really boring around here when nobody is at home!" Carol answered, turning around to kiss him again. "You should find yourself a new hobby!" Doug said. "How are you feeling, btw? Any problems?" he asked. Carol shook her head. "No problems. I feel great…and I'm happy!" she answered, remembering what she wanted to tell him. "Happy?" he asked and she nodded. "Yeah. Because we saved Carter's life!"

He looked at her with questioning eyes, not quite understanding what she meant. "Let me tell. Do you remember the guys from County who were here last May?" she asked and Doug nodded. "Yeah…what about them?" "Well, Cindy called me that night, telling me that the heart went to a mother and the kidneys to some doctor…" "And this doctor was Carter?" Doug asked and Carol nodded smiling. "How do you know that?" he asked again. "I was writing mails with Haleh!" Carol answered. "Wow…that's…that's awesome!" Doug answered laughing. He couldn't believe it. "We have to meet him when we're in Chicago again! Wow!" he smiled and kissed her again.

* * *

The next morning Doug and Carol decorated the living room with birthday stuff; they baked a cake and put the presents for the twins on the table.

"Do you think I should wake them up now?" Carol asked when she looked at her watch. It was almost half past 10 already. "Yeah, I think now is a good time!" Doug answered, getting everything ready.

Carol went upstairs to the twins' room. First she went to Tess's bed and sat down on it. "Happy Birthday, Theresa Helen Ross!" she whispered and put a kiss on Tess' cheek. Tess stirred in her sleep and yawned. "Thank you mum!" she finally answered and sat up in bed to hug her mother. Carol then got up and took a seat on Kate's bed. "Happy Birthday, Katherine Sarah Ross!" she whispered again, putting a kiss on Kate's cheek, too. Kate got up quickly to hug her mother. "Thanks", she answered, "and thank God you're calling us that way only once a year!" Carol chuckled. "I like your names! And now get up!"

They ran down quickly, excited for their presents. "Happy Birthday, kiddos!" Doug chuckled when they entered the living room. "Thanks dad!" Tess and Kate said excited and hugged him. He noticed that they glanced behind him and he chuckled once again. "Okay…you can look now!" he smiled and the kids made big eyes. They unwrapped their presents with "wow" and "aww" and "oooh". Two brand new snowboards, two snow suits, new gloves and caps, a birthday cake with 22 candles on it. "Thanks, mum and dad!" They both said, hugging their parents once again. "You're welcome!" Carol answered. "Now get ready…we're eating at Richie's today!" Doug said rubbing his hands.

* * *

Stars didn't shine brighter than Tess' and Kate's eyes in the moment they opened the door to Richie's Restaurant. All their friends were there, shouting a loud "SURPRISE!" when Tess and Kate came in.

Carol looked to Doug, smiling and happy, that their secretly planned surprise birthday party was a success. The twins looked so happy and they hugged all their friends and chatted with them immediately. After everybody settled down they came to their parents, both smiling from one ear to the other.

"This is so awesome!" Kate said, whipping with her feet. "Yeah, thanks to you both!" Tess said. "I thought we won't have a party today…" Kate again said. "Well…we know how much you wanted this party. And since it would be too stressful at home, we organized it here! And now have fun girls!" Carol answered, kissing both of her daughters on the cheek. Tess and Kate ran to their friends again and Carol continued talking with another mother. Then Doug interrupted her. "You okay?" he asked concerned. Carol smiled. "I am. I'm taking this easy!" she answered and kissed him slightly. Doug nodded. "Just relax. Don't stress yourself!" Doug smiled and Carol nodded. "Are you sick or something?" Monica, Susan's mother, asked. Carol shook her head. "No…I'm fine!" she answered smiling. 'I'm just pregnant' she finished in her thoughts. Today was Tess' and Kate's day and she just wanted to focus on them today. And her heart made a jump when she saw her daughters laughing and having fun with their friends. These moments were the most beautiful in her life.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7 – Please don't leave me…**

The Ross-Hathaway family survived the birthday party and Thanksgiving without any problems. They enjoyed their free days together but soon school started again and also Doug had to go to work again. Tess and Kate weren't happy about this but at least it was only a month until Christmas.

When they were on the way to the school bus, Doug got ready for work. "Will you be okay?" he asked, not wanting to leave her alone. "I am, Doug! Please, don't worry!" Carol answered, taking his head in her hands and kissing him slightly. "I just don't want to go…" he murmured and Carol smiled. "One of us has to look after the money!" Doug nodded. "Okay…I'll call you!" he answered, placing his hand on her belly and kissing her again. "See you later!" Carol answered smiling when he left the house.

Silence filled the house and Carol sighed. She wasn't feeling well today; she felt nervous and she was tired. She decided to go to bed again but she just couldn't sleep…afraid that something could happen. "Relax!" she said to herself, taking some deep breaths. Maybe the last days were too stressful, but Carol shook this thought off. She didn't do anything…the party at Richie's was well organized; Doug made the turkey for Thanksgiving…he was so caring, doing all the housework, helping with everything. Carol was glad that he was at home all this days; but not even Doug could make her feel better.

"Baby…if only you could tell me what you need!" she whispered when she stroked her belly and a tear ran down her cheek. The last few days she didn't feel concerned but today she did, not knowing why. "I love you…don't forget that!" she said and now the tears came like a waterfall. Carol had to admit that she was scared like hell…

* * *

"Doug…don't go in there!" Sherry called when she saw Doug wanting to enter the trauma room. Doug turned around. "Regan's in there! And this guy is crazy! She needs help!" was all he answered. He just couldn't stand there and do nothing. Not when one of his friends was in trouble.

"What the hell are you doing here?" the man shouted, now pointing the gun in Doug's direction. "Oh God…" Regan whined. Her whole body was shaking. "You need to calm down!" Doug said to the man, holding up his hands. "Oh c'mon…fuck you! All of you!"

"What's your name? We can help you!" Doug asked. He was nervous…this gun was making him nervous.

"That's none of your business! I don't need your help! I hate all of you!" the man shouted again. He was going up and down in that room, always looking between Doug and Regan. "What did we do?" Doug asked. "You killed her!" Now everything became clearer…the man lost someone who was here in the hospital. "This bitch here let her die! She didn't do anything to save her!"

Regan looked concerned to Doug. She thought that this was the end of her short life. "I couldn't save your daughter…she was injured too much!" Regan cried, remembering how she lost this little patient. "Shut up!" the man shouted and Doug saw how he slowly pulled the trigger. It was like everything happened in slow motion now.

Doug jumped to the man, wanting to stop him and to save Regan from the bullet. But suddenly Doug felt the pain. He fell down on the floor, he was breathing hard and only one word came out of his mouth, before his eyes closed: "Carol…"

"Oh God!" Regan now screamed and the man just stood there, not believing what he did. "I'm…I'm sorry…" he murmured and ran out of the room.

Regan hesitated and she jumped to Doug. "Doug…wake up! C'mon!" she tried to wake him, but there was no reaction. "I need help here!" she shouted and soon there were ten people around here.

She couldn't do anything…her hands were shaking when she left the room and a police officer tried to question her about the man.

"I need to call Carol…" Regan cried, still in shock. "Please…can you tell us how the man looked? His name?" the police officer asked. Regan looked at him, now getting mad. "Doug has a wife…and twin daughters! And Carol is pregnant! Don't you think she wants to know what happened? Oh my God…What if he dies? Oh God…" she started to cry again. "I'm sorry for what happened and after this you can call his wife…we just need to find that guy!" officer Miller said. Regan shook her head and she closed her eyes. "His name…it was…Joseph…Joseph Ryan or something like that! His daughter's name was Elena…she died because of a car accident…" Regan remembered. "Thank you, Dr. Pillsbury…we will fin him. And good luck to Dr. Ross!" the officer answered, getting up from his chair. Regan nodded.

Now she needed to call Carol. This would kill her. What would she say? Slowly she dialed Carol's number.

"Regan…is Doug bothering you again?" Carol smiled when she answered the phone. "Oh Carol…" Regan started to cry again and Carol's world was going under. "What? What is it, Reg?" she asked, covering her mouth with her hand. "Doug…you need to come!"

Oh no. No. "Regan…" Carol said, not believing all of this. "Just come here!" Regan answered and with that she hung up.

Carol's body was shaking. 'Please not…oh God' Carol thought when she knelt down, bursting into tears.

She needed to go to the hospital. Now she got nervous. The kids would come home in an hour…so she needed to call the school. She got up from the floor but everything was turning around her and she needed to hold on to the wall. "Shit!" she cried. "Everything will be alright. He promised it…he promised it" she said to herself, over and over again.

She got out her cell phone again, dialing Tess' and Kate's school. She told the teacher that they should come straight to the hospital. And then she managed to get ready for leaving the house.

* * *

When she entered the hospital, the mood was down. It was silent; too silent. "Reg?" Carol called out, nervous about the news she would get. Regan ran to her from around the corner. "Oh Carol!" she started to cry again, "I'm so sorry…you need to sit down…" She pulled Carol to the chairs in the waiting area and they both sat down. "What happened?" Carol asked again silently. "He got shot. We were in that trauma room with this guy…he had a gun and he wanted to shoot me…Doug jumped in front of him…" Regan told her but she needed to stop because she started to cry again. "Oh my God!" Carol said looking shocked to Regan. This wasn't true; all this wasn't happening. "You're kidding, right?" Carol asked. Regan shook her head. "I need to see him!" Carol said. "He's in the OR right now…" "I NEED to see him!"

Regan waited with her all the time outside of the OR when Jane came by. "You okay, Carol?" she asked and Carol shook her head. "No…the whole day I felt nervous and I'm tired and dizzy and…no, nothing is okay right now!" she answered, smiling a little. Jane nodded. She wanted to lay Carol in a hospital bed but right now this wasn't possible. This was hard…for Carol and also for the baby inside her. But right now Carol was only thinking about Doug. "He promised me that everything will be alright. That he's not going to let me or the baby die. And now he's the one…" Carol couldn't finish this sentence. "He will be alright", Jane said, sitting down beside Carol. Carol just leaned against her, counting the seconds. Regan looked concerned to Jane. Jane took a deep breath and just shrugged. There was nothing they could do right now.

Carol looked up again when Cindy, Doug's secretary, arrived with the twins. "Mum…what happened?" Kate asked, not letting go of Tess' hand. "Oh babies", Carol got up to hug her daughters, "your daddy…he got shot…he's in the OR now...!" And with that, all three of them started to cry, scared that they would lose a husband, a best friend and a father. "He'll be okay babies. He'll be okay!" Carol stroke their backs; not knowing if it was the truth or not. She was dying inside. She couldn't live without Doug; the girls needed him and the baby would need him too. Carol couldn't go through all this without him. She wasn't supposed to be alone from one second to the other. He needed to be okay. She couldn't live without him.

"Carol?" She turned around when she heard Dr. Kerr's voice. She turned around to him, not exactly wanting to hear the answer. Dr. Kerr looked beat. He took a deep breath before he started to speak. Carol almost collapsed…she wasn't prepared for this…she only wanted to see her soul mate. She only wanted to be with him…

_**AN**__: Cliffhanger! Sorry, I had to do this…isn't this driving you crazy? It would drive me crazy! But pls, tell me what you think about all this! Thanks for your reviews until now, it's good to know that someone is reading my fics! Thanks a lot!_

_And, this isn't over! So stay tuned!_


	8. Chapter 8

_**AN: **__Here comes a new chapter! Hope you all like it ;) Love, Sandy_

* * *

**Chapter 8 ****– Dreams**

He was gone. Doug wasn't there in the morning when Carol opened her eyes. He didn't tell her that he loved her every day. He didn't kiss her anymore. She didn't feel him anymore.

Her life was like hell. She missed him every second; it hurt so much in her heart. He was the love of her life but he was gone. He wouldn't come back. She was all alone with their daughters and the baby. Why? Why did he go into that room? Why did the guy shoot? Why wasn't she with him when he closed his eyes the last time?

Carol suddenly woke up. She was sweating and breathing hard from her dream. Where was she? She looked around in the dark room. Now she realized that she was in a hospital room. What happened?

Suddenly she noticed the IV in her hand. 'Oh no' she thought, remembering how it turned black in front of her eyes and she fell down. 'Not again…' She tried to sit up in the bed. And then she realized that she collapsed before Dr. Kerr told her the news about Doug. She still didn't know what was going on with him. "Jane?" she shouted, hoping that her friend was around somewhere. But it was silent again. Carol called once more and then she tried to get up from that bed.

"You should rest some more!" Jane said silently when she entered the room and found Carol's feet out of the bed. "Can I see him now?" Carol asked, a single tear rolling down her cheek. "Where are my girls?"

"They're sleeping in the lounge, Liz is watching them!" Jane answered, checking Carol's IV. "Jane…" Carol started but Jane interrupted her. "You were dehydrated! And you collapsed again…Care, the baby…" "Jane!" Carol spoke out loudly, "Doug is more important right now! I want to see him…oh God, please tell me that he is okay! Please!" She fell back on the bed when she started to cry and her whole body was shaking. "Shh Carol…", Jane tried to calm her down, "he's out of danger. He's okay, Carol!"

Carol almost jumped up hearing that. "He's okay?" she asked once again, just to be sure. Jane nodded. "Still sleeping, but he's out of danger" Jane repeated. Carol closed her eyes and took a deep breath, smiling. He was okay. He wouldn't leave her, like he promised. Carol wiped away her tears and she sat up to hug Jane. "He's okay…" she said, over and over again.

He looked awful. His skin was pale and his mouth was dry, his eyes flickering from a dream. But it didn't matter. His chest rising up and down was the most important thing now. He was breathing life in and out. Tears of happiness formed in Carol's eyes when she took a seat beside his bed. She just could look at him, seeing all his beauty and developing more love for him than ever.

Carol thought about her life, her childhood, her mother, her falling in love with Doug, her suicide attempt. How much did she hate her life back then that she wanted to end it?

She had never been more thankful that Mark Greene, Susan Lewis and all the others at county saved her life. She didn't want to change it, not even for a lot of money. This was what made her happy; her life with Doug and the twins was the most important thing in her life.

She took his hand in hers and sat there, watching him without saying a word but thinking about her love for him; about the future with him and she never wanted to be apart from him. Never ever again.

Doug was coughing and snapping after air when he woke up from the narcosis. He felt the pain in his stomach and he breathed hard. Carol. He needed to see her. And when he looked left he immediately felt better. She was sleeping in the chair and he noticed the IV in her hand. Somehow he needed to smile; again two of them in the hospital. But then he remembered that he could've been dead. Why didn't he just wait for the securities? Why did he go in that room without any help? Well, he remembered that it was just to save Regan. He didn't think that this guy would really shoot. Regan helped him so much when he first came to Seattle. They soon became friends and Regan was the one who saved Doug from depression. He remembered how she came in that bar, taking away the glass of Whiskey from his hand and telling him that she wanted to help him; that she was there for him when he needed someone to talk. Somehow she knew that something wasn't right with him and he talked to her; he told her about Chicago, about Carol, about Ricky Abott and how he screwed up everything. She made him clear that alcohol didn't solve any problems. That, if Carol really loved him, everything will turn out like it's supposed to be. That Carol probably only needed time. That she would've done the same with Ricky. That he needed to be strong.

And eventually she was right with everything.

"Oh…you're awake…" he heard Carol's whisper and he turned his head to her. "Hey…", he answered with a hoarse voice and smiled a little, "I'm sorry…"

"I thought I'd lose you today…" Carol said and a single tear rolled down her face again.

"I know…I'm sorry…I'm not going anywhere…" he answered, taking her hand in his. "Did I tell you today that I love you?"

Carol smiled. "I love you, too!" She got up from her seat and bent down to kiss him. "Don't try that ever again!" She smiled at him and stroked her fingers over his cheeks.

"I'm trying not to! What happened to you?" he asked, pointing to her IV.

"Dehydration. Passed out again…" she told him and sat down again. Doug took a deep breath and shook his head. "Everything's not so easy than we thought, huh?"

Carol nodded. "But we're okay. I'm fine and our baby is fine!"

Doug smiled. "That's good! Where are our girls?" "They're sleeping…they were so scared…"

"Ah…I bet they're happy to stay at home from school tomorrow!" he joked and laughed, but then stopped because of the pain. "At least you didn't lose your humor!" Carol smiled.

Regan noticed that Doug was awake and so she decided to go into the room. "Hey!" Carol smiled, happier than ever. "Oh Doug…you saved my life!" Regan just said, so thankful for what Doug had done. And she was so thankful that he survived this. "Like you saved mine…long time ago…" Doug answered, "I think now we're even!" Smiling, Regan nodded, but then she burst out in tears. "Hey…what's wrong hun?" Carol asked, getting up to hug her. "Oh my God…he could be dead! And all just because of me!" Regan cried. "But he didn't. Look at him, he's okay. Everything is okay Reg!" Carol tried to calm her down. "But what if? I could never look into your eyes Carol!"

Carol smiled. "Don't ask yourself, what if. Let's be happy that both of you came out safely!"

Regan nodded, finally calming down a bit. "So…I haven't seen Dr. Kerr around…do you know what exactly happened?" Carol asked again. "The bullet grazed your kidney and it was stuck in a layer of fat. No major injury, you just need to prevent an infection! Could've been a great deal worse…and the police found the guy" Regan said, turning to Doug. "Thank God…and now show me a smile!" Doug answered and Regan did so. She sat down beside Carol on a chair. "What a day…I haven't slept since yesterday…" she took a deep breath and rubbed her eyes. "So I guess Connor is very lonely?" Carol smiled. "Who's Connor?" Doug asked, not knowing anything. "Well…he's my boyfriend!" Regan answered and finally she smiled from one ear to the other. "Thanks you didn't tell me anything!" Doug said, playing the offended. "Okay…where shall I start…" Regan started and she told her best friends everything, from the beginning to the end.

"Do you think daddy's awake already?" Kate asked her sister, who just got up from their sleep. "C'mon…let's go take a look!" Tess answered getting up. Kate hesitated. "What if he dies?" she asked. "He won't. Dr. Kerr said he's okay. Now let's go see!" Tess answered, absolutely determined.

Silently they strolled through the floor; it was like in a ghost town. No nurses or doctors were there and they heard no sound. Thank God they knew the hospital and they finally found their daddy's room.

Silently they went in, not wanting to wake up their mum and dad, who were silently sleeping in Doug's bed, Carol cuddled to Doug.

"I guess everything's fine then…" Kate whispered and Tess nodded. "Looks so!"

Kate looked around in the room. "Do you think he kept the bullet?" she asked and Tess shrugged. "I don't know Kate…c'mon, let's sleep in that bed!" she yawned and they finally found peace for that night in the hospital bed beside their parents.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9 – ****Coming Home for Christmas**

Slowly but surely Doug recovered from his injury and he was released from the hospital around the middle of December. Sometimes the wound still hurt but he was just happy that everything was okay. Carol felt great; she didn't collapse since Doug got shot and she didn't feel dizzy anymore. She had a good appetite and she also started to gain some weight.

It was really cold in Seattle and everything was covered in white snow. The twins thought that this was great and they spend mostly all weekend in the mountains to snowboard with their friend Tayler and Dylan. Everything was back to normal.

"Mum! Can you believe it? I jumped today without falling down!" Kate said delighted when the twins came back from the snowboard trip. She didn't even care about the snow she had on her boots and snow suit, when she ran into the living room to her mum. "It was soooo awesome; Tess and I also learned how to turn while driving! So cool!" "That's great sweetie! But how often did I tell you to take off your boots and that suit in the corridor…everything's wet now!" Carol complained. She was happy that her daughters had fun, but Kate sometimes was such a mess. "Told you so…" Tess murmured, who was already in her sport suit. Kate rolled her eyes. "I'm sorry…where's dad?" Kate asked, not thinking about the dirt she caused anymore. "Hospital. Cindy got the tickets to Chicago…"

"Do we really have to fly?" Tess asked, not very happy about the vacation to Chicago. "Yes, we do! Your grandmothers can't wait to see you again!" Carol answered, slightly annoyed. Tess and Kate started to wail. When they were younger, they loved to fly to Chicago; it was much more interesting then. But now…now they were older and had other interests, just like snowboarding and learning how to play the guitar, which they hated when they started to go to school. "C'mon guys…we'll have fun! Now go pack, we're flying tomorrow after school!" Carol said while she wiped up the floor. The last few days she started to do a little bit in the house because she couldn't just sit around and do nothing. Doug gave up complaining about it; it was a Mission Impossible. Tess and Kate murmured something inaudible and they ran upstairs into their room. Carol sighed. It was hard to see her babies growing up so quickly. But she also knew that they would change their minds when they finally were in Chicago.

At night, when the kids finally were in bed and everybody had packed their suitcases, Carol crawled into the warm bed to Doug, who had his eyes closed. "Hey…what's up?" Carol asked, cuddling closer to him. Doug sighed when he opened his eyes. "I feel the weather changing!" he answered, putting an arm around her. Carol looked at him with a contorted face. "The scar again?" she asked and he nodded. She put her hand around his stomach and traced with her finger over the scar. Then she bent down so she could kiss it, from its beginning to its end. Doug smiled. "It's better already!" he said and Carol came up to his mouth, kissing him passionately. "Mhm…I don't even feel it anymore now!" he smiled again and put a curl behind her ear. "Did I tell you today that I love you?" Carol asked and Doug nodded. "Twice, I think!" he answered and kissed her again. "Let me show you how much I love you!" Carol whispered and they made passionate love and fell asleep afterwards, arm in arm.

The next day everything was hectic. They needed to get ready with everything until they finally left the house to get the twins from school. Carol already felt tired again; she hated such turbulent mornings.

"I hope they have something good to eat on the plane. I'm starving!" Kate murmured when she got in the car. "You can eat something at the airport!" Carol answered yawning. "Can we go to McDonald's?" Tess asked excited. Carol looked to Doug and he shrugged. "Why not…" he murmured, not in the mood for a discussion. Carol sighed. It was always the same when they were flying to Chicago. Tess and Kate wanted to stay at home, Carol was nervous and Doug was still pissed that the flight to Mark's funeral was cancelled.

*FLASHBACK*

It was a wonder that they arrived that early on the airport. Tess and Kate were both sleeping in their stroller, missing everything around them. "Are you staying with them while I check in?" Carol asked and Doug nodded. They still couldn't believe that their best friend died because of a brain tumor. They couldn't believe that they haven't noticed anything or that nobody told them about Mark. But then they got the invitation from Lizzy…to come to Mark's funeral.

They booked an early flight, just to be sure to be there in time.

Then Carol came back, almost crying. "What's up?" Doug asked, looking at her. "Flight is cancelled…" Carol answered, not believing it. "What? Why?" Doug asked. "They have problems with the booking agency…seems that our tickets aren't legal…" Carol said and the typed something on her cell phone.

Doug put his head into his hands. This wasn't true…this wasn't happening right now. He wanted to be there. He wanted to say good bye to his best friend. "Can't we take another flight?" he asked. "The next flight is at 1pm..." "That's too late…" he said, getting up and going around, thinking. They wouldn't make it to the funeral.

"You and the twins take the flight at 1. I'm going by train. Maybe I come there in time…but you…"

"You want to go by train? Doug…that's insane…" Carol said, taking his hand. "You have a better idea?" he asked, when she realized that a tear rolled down his cheek. Carol wiped it away with her fingers. "I think we all should go with the plane. Maybe we won't make it to the funeral, but we can say good bye to him privately. And we can be with Elizabeth and Ella…" Carol said. This was the best they could do…

When they finally arrived at the cemetery, they found Mark's grave and Elizabeth sitting there, looking out to no one. She looked up when she heard Tess' and Kate's chatter. "God, Elizabeth…I'm so sorry…" Carol hugged her and she started to cry. "Thanks Carol…thank you for coming!" Elizabeth answered calmly. "We're too late…the flight got cancelled…" Carol apologized. "But you're here now. That means a lot to me!"

Doug went straight to the grave, putting down flowers and little angels from Tess and Kate. "See you, buddy!" he whispered and then he couldn't hold back the tears anymore. He didn't believe it until now. "Sorry I've been such a badass…" he said in his thoughts, hoping that Mark could ever forgive him.

"Daddy cwaying?" Tess asked, looking to him with her big brown eyes. "Yeah sweetie…daddy's sad…"

"It's okay Doug….it's okay…" Carol said when she bent down to him, stroking his back and crying with him.

*END FLASHBACK*

This day everything went okay. There were no problems at the check in and so they had plenty of time to eat.

After some burgers and fries it was time to board. They got four seats in one row and now the twins were fighting, who of them could sit at the window. "Please…Tess can sit at the window now and Kate when we're flying home!" Carol got angry, while she put the hand luggage away. Tess smiled because of her triumph but Kate was not happy with that. "Why is she allowed now?" she asked her mother. "Because she's the oldest!" Carol answered. Kate just rolled her eyes and sat down beseide her sister, not speaking a word with her. Then Carol joined them and finally Doug sat down, too. Carol took his hand into hers and she closed her eyes. It was one year since they last had been to Chicago, but they didn't visit County then. They just stayed some days to visit Carol's mother and Doug's mother. Now they'd stay for one week and they would have enough time to visit County. And Carol had to tell the news of her pregnancy to her mother and mother in law. That would be a surprise!


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10 – ****Merry Christmas?**

After the five hours flight they were all sitting in the rental car on the way to the hotel. "Hey…we're going to stay in the same hotel as last year!" Kate mentioned, finally getting happier. "Yesss! Great, they have that awesome whirlpool!" Tess answered high-fiving with her sister. Carol and Doug smiled. Everything was okay now.

Tess and Kate immediately jumped on the bed when they saw how big it was. "Girls…please don't jump on the bed! Get down!" Carol said when she opened the window to let in fresh air. "What are we going to do now?" Tess asked, sitting on the bed now. "Mum called…she won't be here on the Christmas holidays, so we should visit her today or tomorrow!" Doug called from the bathroom. "So? Wanna go today?" Carol asked, taking a seat beside her daughters. "Yeah, why not…" Kate answered. "Yeah, I can't wait to see Oscar again!" Tess said excited and Carol smiled. "Oscar, that little rascal…" Doug said with a deep voice and the girls had to laugh. "Oscar is a good dog!" Kate said laughing.

Carol got up and looked out of the window when it started to snow again. She sighed. Chicago sure was known as the windy city but it was also the snowy city. Outside everything was decorated with Christmas stuff; it looked beautiful.

Doug hugged her from behind and put his hand on her stomach. "Do you miss it?" he asked, looking out with her. Carol shook her head slightly. "No…not really…" she answered, turning around to hug him. "It's great to be back…but…Seattle is where our home is!"

Doug smiled and kissed her, glad to hear this. He always thought that Carol would miss the city, which she didn't want to leave when he first moved to Seattle. When Doug first arrived in Seattle, he immediately fell in love with the city. It was different than Chicago but much clearer and more silent. It was beautiful. And he knew that Carol would love it.

When Carol spent her first week in Seattle she felt awkward. Everything was new to her; she didn't know anybody or where anything was. Doug showed her around a lot and they took long walks with the twins and Carol realized how beautiful it was around there. She fell in love with Seattle and their beautiful house on the lake.

Some minutes later they were on the way to Sarah Ross with the rental car. Tess and Kate were singing Christmas songs while Carol watched out of the window and looked around. "Remember that restaurant?" Doug asked and he pointed out of the window to a building. "No, what about it?" Carol asked looking at him. "We wanted to go there on our very first date!" he chuckled. Carol started to laugh. "Why didn't you go there?" Tess asked, now getting curious. "Well, we were really busy at home…right baby?" Carol laughed again and patted Doug's leg. Tess and Kate just looked at each other and shook their heads, not really understanding the reason.

When they finally arrived at Sarah's house outside the city, the twins couldn't wait to get in. It was freezing cold outside and the snow was falling heavy on the ground. But before they reached the door, Sarah looked out of it. "Awww guys, c'mon in…it's warm in here!"

Family Ross-Hathaway ran inside, just to be away from the cold. "It's so good to see you! You beauty!" Sarah whined and hugged Carol. "And you…look at you, aren't you getting older?" she said looking at her son and hugging him too. "Mum…stop it!" Doug chuckled. "Where are my beautiful granddaughters?" Sarah just asked, looking around. "Didn't they say hi?" Carol asked, putting her hands in her hips. "It's okay, they're probably entertaining Oscar!" Sarah grinned. She was so happy to see her son and her daughter in law. "So, are you hungry? I made dinner!"

"Grandma!" Tess and Kate both shouted and they ran to Sarah to hug her. "My babies! Man, stop growing!" Sarah chuckled again, stroking both of their heads. Tess and Kate smiled; they were really proud of themselves.

They all sat on the table when Sarah brought the meal. The whole table was full of it. "We can't eat that much!" Kate said and Tess laughed. "Just eat as much as you can!" Sarah answered, opening a bottle of wine. "No wine for me, thanks!" Carol mentioned instinctually, not thinking that she still didn't tell the news of her pregnancy. Sarah chuckled again. "C'mon…you aren't pregnant, are you?"

Carol looked to Doug and she chuckled, just like he did. Tess and Kate were both looking at their parents. "Well…I am, actually!" Carol said smiling. Sarah looked at her shocked. "Really?" she asked and Carol nodded. "Beginning of the third month!" "But…how are you feeling? You didn't stress yourself when Doug was in the hospital?" Sarah asked concerned, knowing about the risks. "It was tough at the beginning, but I'm okay now. I feel great!" Carol smiled. "Aww…congratulations to you then!" Sarah squeed happily.

They spent the whole day at Sarah's house, chatting, playing games with the twins and sharing Christmas presents. The twins weren't allowed to open their presents before Christmas Day, so they got mad again and didn't speak a word until they entered the hotel room. "Can we use the whirlpool now? Mum, please?" Kate, who found her voice again, asked. Carol shook her head. "Did you see how late it is? You can take a bath now and then go to bed!" she answered, taking a seat on the master bed. "Oh mum…pleaaaase! We'll be good girls all the vacation long!" Tess tried to change her mother's mind. "Nooooooooo! It's been a long day…so just take a bath and then we'll all have a good sleep!" Doug imitated his daughter's whining.

"I can't wait until we get older and we can do what we want!" Tess murmured when they went to the bathroom. Doug and Carol smiled. No matter how often they had a fight; in such things they always stuck together.

While the kids took a bath, Carol's phone rang. "Hey mum!" she said, picking it up. "Carol! When are you coming?" Helen asked.

"When do you want us to come?"

"I don't care when! Just come!"

"Okay, we will, don't panic mum!"

"How are you all? How are Tess and Kate?"

"They're fine…we're all fine! Mum, we're really tired…we'll talk later okay?"

"What have you done all day?"

Carol rolled her eyes; her mother hadn't changed a bit.

"We landed around half past 4 and then we visited Doug's mother!"

"Oh…" Helen answered and Carol could her disappointment in her voice.

"We're coming soon mum!" Carol said.

"Okay. Tell the twins I said hi!" Helen said and Carol nodded although her mother couldn't see it. "See you!"

Doug chuckled. "I can't wait to see Helen again!" Carol just threw a look to Doug's direction.

On Christmas morning they arrived at Helen's and Javier's apartment. "Oh, I thought you would never come!" Helen said when she opened the door but then hugged her daughter. Then she looked at Doug and the twins, almost crying. "I missed you all so much!" she hugged all of them. "We missed you too!" Doug answered, kissing her cheek. Tess and Kate already were annoyed from all the hugging and kissing. "Merry Christmas!" they said in union and put a smile on their face. "Merry Christmas to you, too! Your present is waiting under the Christmas tree!" Helen answered and the kids ran in, not wanting to wait. "C'mon in!" Helen said then and Doug and Carol walked in, hugging Javier and taking a seat on the couch in the living room, watching their daughters unwrapping the presents from Helen and Sarah.

"Doug, how are you doing?" Helen asked, knowing that he got shot. "I'm okay…I was very lucky!" Doug answered, showing her the scar from the bullet. "Thank God! Carol made me nervous when she called me!" Helen answered and Carol sighed. "We all were scared…" Carol said, not looking at her mother. "I have to tell you something…"

"Are you coming back to Chicago?" Helen asked excited. Carol rolled her eyes. "No mum, we're not coming back to Chicago!" Carol said. She almost forgot how exhausting it was to talk with her mother. "So, what?" Helen asked again. "She's got a bun in the oven!" "Katie!" Carol looked surprised to her daughter. "What? That's wad dad said!" Kate answered, not paying anymore attention to her mum, but to their new Nintendo Wii. "You're pregnant?" Helen asked and Carol nodded, taking a deep breath. "Oh…but…" "We know about the risks Helen. But everything will be fine!" Doug said, taking Carol's hand in his. "I'm going to my OB every week; I'm getting medicaments and vitamins. Everything is okay!" Carol finished. Helen looked at them really surprised and smiled then. "I wish you all the best!"

After Doug joined his daughters in playing games on the Wii, Carol helped her mother in the kitchen. "Do you really want to get this baby?" Helen asked. "What?" Carol asked, not believing to hear such a question from her mother. "You could die!"

Carol rolled her eyes and stopped drying the dishes. "Why can't you just be happy about this?" "Carol…I'm scared! And you shouldn't get the baby just to make Doug happy!" Helen whispered. Carol felt the tears in her eyes and the anger rising up inside her. "You know what…we shouldn't have told you…I can't believe you!" she said and got out from the sight of her mother. "Pack your things together…we're going!" Carol said when she entered the living room again. Doug knew exactly why. "Why so soon?" Tess asked. "Don't ask…let's just go!" Why couldn't her mother just be happy about the news? Why didn't she see that Carol was happy?


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 1****1 – Thank You**

Carol didn't speak a word on the way back to the hotel. "Mum?" Tess asked carefully. Carol turned around to her daughter. "Did you have a fight with grandma?" the girl asked and Carol nodded. "Yeah…" "Why?" Kate asked. "Babies…I don't wanna talk about it now!" Carol answered and she turned around again to look out of the window. "Is it because of the baby?" Tess asked again. "I've seen that she wasn't happy when you told her", she finished. Carol sighed. "I don't know why she isn't happy…"

"Because she loves you! You're her daughter…" Doug said and Carol nodded. "Yeah, well…we all are happy, aren't we?" she said and put a smile on her face. "We are! And I love you all!" Doug said looking in the rear mirror. "We love you too, daddy!" Kate smiled. "And we love the new Wii!" Tess continued smiling. "Thank God!" Carol said and she chuckled.

The next days they started to have real fun. They went ice-skating and Doug acted like he couldn't skate. He always fell down and the twins couldn't stop to laugh. Carol watched them from outside; she wouldn't risk falling down and hurting herself. To see Doug and the girls laughing was heaven for her. And Doug always looked at her smiling, telling her that he loved her in his thoughts. 'Can't wait to see you and daddy together…' Carol thought when she laid her hand on her stomach which slowly started to grow. Carol smiled and waved to them when the twins called for her.

"Now that was fun daddy!" Kate said and she stopped to get her breath back. Doug chuckled. "Totally…but I'm done! You two are too quick for me!" Doug answered and then he lost his balance and fell on his butt again. Tess and Kate bent down to him but they couldn't stop laughing. "Oh dad…you should stop skating!" Tess laughed, helping him up again. "Yeah, I said exactly the same to him, once!" Carol called from outside and Doug started to laugh. "Yeah, I'm a crashkid!"

"You have beautiful daughters!" a voice behind Carol said. Carol gasped, knowing that voice. She turned around and couldn't believe it. "Oh my God!" she jumped up to hug Susan Lewis, which she hadn't seen for so many years. "Wow…what are you doing here? How are you?"

Susan smiled. "Haleh told me that you're here before you go visit County! And I just couldn't wait! How long has it been…and you didn't change a bit!" she answered.

"And you're still a beauty! Hello there, Auntie Susie!" Doug said as he and the twins skated to the women. "Doug! C'mere!" she called out and hugged him. "Wow…how long has it been since we last saw each other? You two were little rascals!" Susan said, looking at Tess and Kate. "Well, I can't remember you…I'm Kate!" the girl said and they shook hands. Susan chuckled. Carol smiled at the directness of her daughter. "Susan also worked with us in Chicago. She was at our wedding, remember?" Carol said looking at the twins. Tess and Kate just shrugged. They were three years old then and they didn't remember anything. "So you must be Tess…wow, you two are getting so big!" Susan said, shaking hands with Tess too. The twins nodded proudly. "How are Chuck and Cosmo? Are they here too?" Carol asked. "No, they stayed at home. I'm just here for a short visit and I'm going back tomorrow!"

"So, are you visiting county today too?" Doug asked and Susan nodded. "Great, we can go together then!" Doug answered and Susan laughed. "I can't believe that you'll be back at County!"

So the five got ready to visit the hospital and Carol got really nervous again. She couldn't wait to see Haleh and Carter again.

After a lot of chit chatting they arrived at the ambulance bay. Carol smiled. "Lot's of memories huh?" Susan said and Carol nodded. "Not the same without Doc Magoos!" Doug mentioned and the women rolled their eyes.

When they entered the hospital, Carol and Doug couldn't believe their eyes. There was no sign that this once was the ER…everything looked different, newer. It was beautiful.

"Holy Jesus, I can't believe you're here!" Haleh stormed to them from the suture room and the hugging and kissing began again. "This is so awesome! I've missed you all!"

Carol smiled. "We missed you, too…everything here…looks so different!" she mentioned and looked around again. "It's still the same old place, Carol, the same old place!"

"Sooo…is this the famous Dr. Ross?" Archie Morris asked who came around and saw Haleh with them. "Famous?" Doug asked chuckling. "Well, Haleh's talking about you since one month, so yeah, famous! Archie Morris! Nice to meet you!" Morris said and they shook hands. Then he turned to Carol. "Oooh…oooh…wow. Hi!"

Carol smiled as she shook Morris' hand. "Nice to meet you, Dr. Morris!" she answered. "Morris, get Carter!" Haleh said and Morris put his well-known grin on his face.

"He's funny!" Tess said and she and her sister chuckled.

While they were waiting for Carter in the lounge they talked about everything. "So, how's your pregnancy going?" Haleh asked, but Susan interrupted Carol. "You're pregnant again?" she asked surprised and Carol nodded smiling. "I am!" "Did you plan this?" Susan asked again and both Carol and Doug shook their heads. "Not really…well, we always wanted to have another kid, but as you know what happened the last time…" she paused and looked to Kate, who looked at her concerned, "we always knew that it's risky. But it happened…and we decided to keep the baby, no matter what. The first month was hard…my OB found out that the baby needs more blood than I have and I collapsed and was dehydrated, but now the medicaments I get help a lot. I feel great!" She looked to Kate again and stroked her hair, conveying her that everything is okay.

Susan and Haleh smiled. "Congratulations, then!" Susan said and hugged Carol and Doug. "Are you excited to get a brother or a sister?" she asked Tess and Kate. Both nodded. "I want to have a brother!" Tess said. "I don't care if it's a boy or a girl!" Kate said. The only thing she wanted was that her mother was okay and that the baby was healthy. "Oh you'll be good sisters!" Haleh mentioned, noticing that Kate was thinking a lot about this.

Finally Carter arrived in the lounge, looking better than ever. Carol and Doug got up. "It's so good to see you!" Carol said and she hugged him. They've always been good friends, but now this all was more exciting, since they found out that they "saved" his life. "It's good to see YOU!" Carter answered. He even hugged the twins. "Oh man…if I knew that you treated that boy who gave me the kidney…I can't thank you enough!"

Doug and Carol smiled. "How small is the world…I'm glad we could help!" Doug answered. "I can't believe Neela and Sam didn't tell anything about meeting you!" Carter said and now sat down. "Yeah, well, when I asked them about County, I didn't mention you…somehow I thought you wouldn't work here anymore…"

"I didn't…for a long time, but then I realized where my roots are!" Carter smiled. "And speaking of roots…I wanna make you an offer". He looked at them before he started to speak again. "You know that I opened the Joshua Carter Center…"

Doug and Carol nodded, knowing exactly what he was up to. "You're the best pediatrician I know, Doug. And I know that you're one of the best nurse managers ever, Carol. I want you two to work at the center. And the paying isn't bad…"

Everybody in the room looked surprised. Especially Tess and Kate looked at their parents, scared that they had to leave Seattle.

"Wow…" Carol murmured and Doug looked to her. He never thought of coming back to Chicago. Carol did, for a long time; she missed the city, her mother and her friends when she moved to Seattle. It was the city where she grew up.

"Thanks for your offer Carter…but we need to talk about this first!" Doug said and Carter nodded. "Of course…take your time. There's no hurry!" Carter answered. "Well, work is waiting for me, I have to run again...was good to see you again!"

"Good to see that you're okay!" Carol answered smiling.

"So, Chicago, huh?" Susan smiled when Carter left the room. "Chicago." Carol smiled. This was all crazy. "Let's grab a coffee somewhere…" Doug mentioned. He just didn't want to stay longer. So they said good bye to Haleh and left the hospital. Carol was sure to come back once more.

"So, how's Seattle?" Susan asked. "Rainy…but so beautiful. We're living on a lake!" Carol told her proudly. "It's not always raining…that's a rumor!" Doug threw in and the women laughed. "You should visit us some time. I really would love to see Cosmo and also Chuck again!" Carol said. "Tell you what…I promise that we will come when the baby is here okay?"

Doug nodded. "It's a shame that we don't visit each other more often…" "Yeah, we're really bad friends!" Carol answered. "We at least should meet once a year!" Susan suggested and everyone thought that this was a good idea.

Susan then looked at her clock. "I have to get back to the airport. I don't want my plane to leave without me!"

Carol nodded and hugged her. "Have a good flight. And write me. Tell Chuck and Cosmo hello…I'm going to miss you!" she said. She always hated goodbyes. "I'm going to miss you all, too! It was a great day!" Susan answered, hugging also Doug, Tess and Kate, who already almost died because of boringness. "It was good to see you again, Auntie Susie!" Doug said grinning. Susan looked to Carol. "He didn't change a bit, did he?"

_**AN:**__ I know that the visit at County was short, but it's just hard to imagine them with Carter, Haleh and Susan after all this years…_


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 1****2 – Refusal**

At night, when the twins already were in bed, Carol started to talk about Carter's job offer. "What do you think about this, Doug?" she asked, turning to look at him when he crawled under the blanket. "I don't know…all I know is that we would be rich then!" Doug answered smiling.

"I don't want to leave Seattle, Doug!" Carol said when she looked into his eyes. "It's where our home is; our beautiful house on the lake, the garden…we have a great job, the girls are going to school there, they have their friends…Regan and Jane are in Seattle and I love them. I don't wanna lose my friends again. I love to be at home with you and that's Seattle!"

Doug smiled at her; he was happy to hear that words from her. He was happy that she loved the city that he had chosen. "I love you…you know that?" he said and then he kissed her. Carol smiled. "I love you too!" she answered stroking his cheek. "But what about you…do you think about the offer?" she asked then. "Seattle is where our home is!" he just said chuckling and kissed her once more. "So, how's our baby today?" he asked, laying his hand on her stomach. "He's fine, I think…hungry, a little bit!" Carol answered giggling. "Oh, still a he? What's his name today?" Doug asked. "Alexander, but I'm calling him Xander!" she answered and Doug nodded. "Alexander Ross…Xander…not bad, not bad!" he answered smiling.

Late at night Doug woke up because he heard one of the twins coming into their room. "Hey, what's up?" he whispered, not wanting to wake up Carol. "Look, I can't sleep!" Tess answered silently. "What's the problem, sweetie?" "Katie and I were talking about Chicago earlier. We decided to stay in Seattle when you two are moving here. But we can't live alone in Seattle, that's the problem!" Tess told him. Doug chuckled again. "You don't have to think about that anymore hun! We're not moving to Chicago!" "We're not?" she asked excited. "No, we're definitely not!" Doug answered yawning. Tess face lit up, she was happy to hear that. "Wanna jump in here?" Doug asked and Tess shrugged. "Yeah daddy…why not!" She cuddled to her daddy, happy that everything would be the same when they'd come home.

The next day they visited Carol's mother again. Carol knew that she wouldn't get an apology from Helen, but she tried not to confront her mum with anything. She avoided talking about the baby or her healthiness and so everything was okay and nobody had to fight.

"Can you help me in the kitchen?" Helen asked Carol and Doug smiled. Carol got up, she sighed. Not another discussion with her mum.

"What now?" Carol asked when they arrived in the kitchen. "Nothing. I just wanted to say I'm sorry. I see how happy you are and I'm happy for you!" Helen said. "Thanks mum" Carol answered but she looked at her skeptical. "You know it's hard for me, Carol!" "What is hard for you, mum?" "I miss everything!" Helen answered now, looking her daughter in the eye. "I don't understand you…what do you mean, you miss everything?" Carol asked. "You live in Seattle, I live in Chicago. I never know how you are doing; I can't see the twins growing up. They got so big this last year and they changed so much…I miss all this. And I will miss it when the baby is born. I won't know what's going on!" Helen turned away from her daughter; she didn't want Carol to see the tears in her eyes. "Oh mum…" Carol said, going to her, so she could hug her. What would she say now? They'd have plenty of room for her mother in their house in Seattle, but no way. Carol couldn't live with her mother under one roof. And Helen had a relationship with Javier. "We survived this the last 11 years, didn't we…" Carol said, parting from her mother again. Helen nodded. "We still love Seattle, mum. We all do. And you have Javier here and I guess you're happy with him…"

Helen nodded, hearing this. "You're right Carol…" she answered knowing that nothing would change. "Monica is just living an hour away…isn't she visiting more often?" Carol asked about her sister. "Every now and then…but when she's coming, she's coming without Thomas" Helen answered. Carol sighed. "Yeah…he's a Teenager now…he's got other interests!" Carol answered smiling, remembering how she caught her nephew with a cigarette at Helen's birthday party two years ago. "The guest room is always free for you, mum. Come, whenever you want. We can pay for your tickets, that's no problem!" she continued then and Helen smiled. "Thank you!"

"What are we doing now, on our last day?" Kate asked and she jumped around in front of her parents. "Yeah, are we going to have some fun? That was kinda boring now at Grandma's!" Tess answered and Doug and Carol laughed. "What do you want to do now?" Doug asked his daughters. "We need to go to County again!" Kate said excited. "Yeah, to tell Carter that you're not taking this job!" Tess continued. Carol grinned. "They're really happy about this!" she smiled and took Doug's hand in hers.

"Hey Archie!" Tess and Kate called when they entered the ER again. "Welcome back, Ladies!" Archie said smiling, looking up from his chart. Sam looked at him with questioning eyes. "Tess and Kate Ross, from Seattle. I guess you know Doug Ross!" Archie said. "Yeah, we met in Seattle!" Doug said and shook hands with Sam. "Ah yeah…I remember…that was the transplantation, right? Oh, and you did work here too?" Sam asked when she shook Carol's hand. Carol nodded. "I did…nine years…I was the head nurse!" Sam chuckled. "That's awesome…don't you miss it?" she asked. Carol shook her head. Now she was head nurse too, but it was balanced because she also was on the transplantation team. "Not a bit!" she smiled. It was different some years ago when her friends still were here. Mark and Elizabeth, Susan, Peter, Kerry, Luka and Abby…everybody was gone now and only Haleh and Carter were the ones that were left from the old gang. "We were born here in this hospital!" Kate mentioned smiling. "Yeah, there's a baby pic of you two in the lounge!" "Rachel Greene! What are you doing here?" Doug asked surprised when he saw the young woman. Rachel smiled. "I'm a med student now, Uncle Doug!" she answered, showing him her ID. "Wow, Rachel that's great!" Carol said smiling. Rachel looked more and more like Mark. "How are you doing? How's Elizabeth?" Carol asked. "I'm great…there's always something to do 'round here!" she smiled. "Elizabeth and Ella are still in England and both doing fine!" she finished. "Good to hear…when you see her the next time, tell her we said hello and she should give me a call!" Carol answered smiling. "I will…I have to go now, see you all soon!" Rachel said and she hugged all four of them. "Are you coming to Seattle again to visit us soon?" Kate asked her, remembering how much fun the twins had with Rachel and Ella the last time. "I hope so! Do you still have your boat?" Rachel asked and the twins nodded. "Well then I can't wait to come!" she smiled and waved them good bye then. "Wow…she's like Mark…" Carol said, looking after her. "She is…" Doug murmured, thinking about his best friend.

"So, is Carter around somewhere?" Carol asked looking around. Archie looked at the board. "Try curtain 2! Are you staying longer, btw?" he asked. "We're flying home this night!" Tess answered excited. "Aww…too bad you'll miss the New Year's Eve party round here!" Archie said and the twins shrugged.

"Doug…we're going to the lounge!" Carol called from curtain 2 when she found Carter and they went to the lounge. "See you later, Archie!" Tess and Kate said and they finally followed Doug to the lounge.

"They're cute, aren't they?" Sam asked, looking at Archie. Archie grinned. "And their mum is sooo…" "Okay Archie. Stop it. I don't wanna hear it!" Sam said, going away from him chuckling.

"So, did you think about my offer?" Carter asked, handing them something to drink. Carol and Doug nodded. "Thanks again for your offer, Carter…we visited the clinic the other day and it looks amazing!" Doug said. "But you don't wanna work there…" Carter answered, already expecting this answer. Carol nodded. "We don't wanna leave Seattle…" she said and Carter nodded. "Well, I expected that!" "You're not mad?" Kate asked. Carol had to smile at the directness of her daughter. "Not at all! It would be a big move and it's totally understandable that you don't want to move back here!" Carter answered. "So, how long are you staying?" he asked again and with that they started to talk about everything and everybody. Carter told about Africa, about Luka, Abby and Joe, about Romano's ironical death and all the other things that happened. Tess and Kate told about their adventures in Seattle, Doug and Carol told about their new friends and their job and then they finally had to leave again. "Have a good flight home…and a happy new year!" Carter said and they all hugged. On the way out of the ER, Archie ran to them. "Hey…I wish you all a happy new year!" he said out of breath, but then smiled. "A happy new year to you too, Dr. Morris!" Carol answered smiling and blinking her eye.

They packed all their things and were then on the way to the airport again. "I think this was the best Chicago vacation we had!" Tess said yawning. "It was funny! But now I'm sitting no the window!" Kate answered, not forgetting that it was her turn now. Carol and Doug laughed.

On the flight home both of the twins fell asleep, so it was pointless that Kate was sitting at the window. "They're beat…" Carol said smiling and Doug nodded. "It was a long day…" Doug answered, yawning too. "I love you!" Carol whispered then and Doug smiled. "I love you!" he answered and kissed her slightly.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13 – ****Refusal**

At night, when the twins already were in bed, Carol started to talk about Carter's job offer. "What do you think about this, Doug?" she asked, turning to look at him when he crawled under the blanket. "I don't know…all I know is that we would be rich then!" Doug answered smiling.

"I don't want to leave Seattle, Doug!" Carol said when she looked into his eyes. "It's where our home is; our beautiful house on the lake, the garden…we have a great job, the girls are going to school there, they have their friends…Regan and Jane are in Seattle and I love them. I don't wanna lose my friends again. I love to be at home with you and that's Seattle!"

Doug smiled at her; he was happy to hear that words from her. He was happy that she loved the city that he had chosen. "I love you…you know that?" he said and then he kissed her. Carol smiled. "I love you too!" she answered stroking his cheek. "But what about you…do you think about the offer?" she asked then. "Seattle is where our home is!" he just said chuckling and kissed her once more. "So, how's our baby today?" he asked, laying his hand on her stomach. "He's fine, I think…hungry, a little bit!" Carol answered giggling. "Oh, still a he? What's his name today?" Doug asked. "Alexander, but I'm calling him Xander!" she answered and Doug nodded. "Alexander Ross…Xander…not bad, not bad!" he answered smiling.

Late at night Doug woke up because he heard one of the twins coming into their room. "Hey, what's up?" he whispered, not wanting to wake up Carol. "Look, I can't sleep!" Tess answered silently. "What's the problem, sweetie?" "Katie and I were talking about Chicago earlier. We decided to stay in Seattle when you two are moving here. But we can't live alone in Seattle, that's the problem!" Tess told him. Doug chuckled again. "You don't have to think about that anymore hun! We're not moving to Chicago!" "We're not?" she asked excited. "No, we're definitely not!" Doug answered yawning. Tess face lit up, she was happy to hear that. "Wanna jump in here?" Doug asked and Tess shrugged. "Yeah daddy…why not!" She cuddled to her daddy, happy that everything would be the same when they'd come home.

The next day they visited Carol's mother again. Carol knew that she wouldn't get an apology from Helen, but she tried not to confront her mum with anything. She avoided talking about the baby or her healthiness and so everything was okay and nobody had to fight.

"Can you help me in the kitchen?" Helen asked Carol and Doug smiled. Carol got up, she sighed. Not another discussion with her mum.

"What now?" Carol asked when they arrived in the kitchen. "Nothing. I just wanted to say I'm sorry. I see how happy you are and I'm happy for you!" Helen said. "Thanks mum" Carol answered but she looked at her skeptical. "You know it's hard for me, Carol!" "What is hard for you, mum?" "I miss everything!" Helen answered now, looking her daughter in the eye. "I don't understand you…what do you mean, you miss everything?" Carol asked. "You live in Seattle, I live in Chicago. I never know how you are doing; I can't see the twins growing up. They got so big this last year and they changed so much…I miss all this. And I will miss it when the baby is born. I won't know what's going on!" Helen turned away from her daughter; she didn't want Carol to see the tears in her eyes. "Oh mum…" Carol said, going to her, so she could hug her. What would she say now? They'd have plenty of room for her mother in their house in Seattle, but no way. Carol couldn't live with her mother under one roof. And Helen had a relationship with Javier. "We survived this the last 11 years, didn't we…" Carol said, parting from her mother again. Helen nodded. "We still love Seattle, mum. We all do. And you have Javier here and I guess you're happy with him…"

Helen nodded, hearing this. "You're right Carol…" she answered knowing that nothing would change. "Monica is just living an hour away…isn't she visiting more often?" Carol asked about her sister. "Every now and then…but when she's coming, she's coming without Thomas" Helen answered. Carol sighed. "Yeah…he's a Teenager now…he's got other interests!" Carol answered smiling, remembering how she caught her nephew with a cigarette at Helen's birthday party two years ago. "The guest room is always free for you, mum. Come, whenever you want. We can pay for your tickets, that's no problem!" she continued then and Helen smiled. "Thank you!"

"What are we doing now, on our last day?" Kate asked and she jumped around in front of her parents. "Yeah, are we going to have some fun? That was kinda boring now at Grandma's!" Tess answered and Doug and Carol laughed. "What do you want to do now?" Doug asked his daughters. "We need to go to County again!" Kate said excited. "Yeah, to tell Carter that you're not taking this job!" Tess continued. Carol grinned. "They're really happy about this!" she smiled and took Doug's hand in hers.

"Hey Archie!" Tess and Kate called when they entered the ER again. "Welcome back, Ladies!" Archie said smiling, looking up from his chart. Sam looked at him with questioning eyes. "Tess and Kate Ross, from Seattle. I guess you know Doug Ross!" Archie said. "Yeah, we met in Seattle!" Doug said and shook hands with Sam. "Ah yeah…I remember…that was the transplantation, right? Oh, and you did work here too?" Sam asked when she shook Carol's hand. Carol nodded. "I did…nine years…I was the head nurse!" Sam chuckled. "That's awesome…don't you miss it?" she asked. Carol shook her head. Now she was head nurse too, but it was balanced because she also was on the transplantation team. "Not a bit!" she smiled. It was different some years ago when her friends still were here. Mark and Elizabeth, Susan, Peter, Kerry, Luka and Abby…everybody was gone now and only Haleh and Carter were the ones that were left from the old gang. "We were born here in this hospital!" Kate mentioned smiling. "Yeah, there's a baby pic of you two in the lounge!" "Rachel Greene! What are you doing here?" Doug asked surprised when he saw the young woman. Rachel smiled. "I'm a med student now, Uncle Doug!" she answered, showing him her ID. "Wow, Rachel that's great!" Carol said smiling. Rachel looked more and more like Mark. "How are you doing? How's Elizabeth?" Carol asked. "I'm great…there's always something to do 'round here!" she smiled. "Elizabeth and Ella are still in England and both doing fine!" she finished. "Good to hear…when you see her the next time, tell her we said hello and she should give me a call!" Carol answered smiling. "I will…I have to go now, see you all soon!" Rachel said and she hugged all four of them. "Are you coming to Seattle again to visit us soon?" Kate asked her, remembering how much fun the twins had with Rachel and Ella the last time. "I hope so! Do you still have your boat?" Rachel asked and the twins nodded. "Well then I can't wait to come!" she smiled and waved them good bye then. "Wow…she's like Mark…" Carol said, looking after her. "She is…" Doug murmured, thinking about his best friend.

"So, is Carter around somewhere?" Carol asked looking around. Archie looked at the board. "Try curtain 2! Are you staying longer, btw?" he asked. "We're flying home this night!" Tess answered excited. "Aww…too bad you'll miss the New Year's Eve party round here!" Archie said and the twins shrugged.

"Doug…we're going to the lounge!" Carol called from curtain 2 when she found Carter and they went to the lounge. "See you later, Archie!" Tess and Kate said and they finally followed Doug to the lounge.

"They're cute, aren't they?" Sam asked, looking at Archie. Archie grinned. "And their mum is sooo…" "Okay Archie. Stop it. I don't wanna hear it!" Sam said, going away from him chuckling.

"So, did you think about my offer?" Carter asked, handing them something to drink. Carol and Doug nodded. "Thanks again for your offer, Carter…we visited the clinic the other day and it looks amazing!" Doug said. "But you don't wanna work there…" Carter answered, already expecting this answer. Carol nodded. "We don't wanna leave Seattle…" she said and Carter nodded. "Well, I expected that!" "You're not mad?" Kate asked. Carol had to smile at the directness of her daughter again. "Not at all! It would be a big move and it's totally understandable that you don't want to move back here!" Carter answered. "So, how long are you staying?" he asked again and with that they started to talk about everything and everybody. Carter told about Africa, about Luka, Abby and Joe, about Romano's ironical death and all the other things that happened. Tess and Kate told about their adventures in Seattle, Doug and Carol told about their new friends and their job and then they finally had to leave again. "Have a good flight home…and a happy new year!" Carter said and they all hugged. On the way out of the ER, Archie ran to them. "Hey…I wish you all a happy new year!" he said out of breath, but then smiled. "A happy new year to you too, Dr. Morris!" Carol answered smiling and blinking her eye.

They packed all their things and were then on the way to the airport again. "I think this was the best Chicago vacation we had!" Tess said yawning. "It was funny! But now I'm sitting at the window!" Kate answered, not forgetting that it was her turn now. Carol and Doug laughed.

On the flight home both of the twins fell asleep, so it was pointless that Kate was sitting at the window. "They're beat…" Carol said smiling and Doug nodded. "It was a long day…" Doug answered, yawning too. "I love you!" Carol whispered then and Doug smiled. "I love you!" he answered and kissed her slightly.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14 ****– Friends**

Carol opened the door to their house and went in with the twins while Doug brought in the suitcases. The kids and their mum collapsed on the couch. "Finally at home…" Carol said, soaking in the scent of their home. She didn't hear an answer of her daughters; they already fell asleep on the couch again. Carol yawned and got up to look if there were messages on the answering machine. She smiled when she heard Regan's message.

"Hey there, pals! And welcome back to Seattle; we hope you had a good flight! Just wanted to let you know that we missed you like hell, so we're glad that you're back. Call me as soon as you get up in the morning…I want to hear all news from Chicago. Hope you're all okay! See you!"

"What was that?" Doug asked as he cuddled Carol from behind. Carol turned around and put her hands around his neck. "That was Regan. She's already desperate without us!" Carol smiled. "See…we can't even leave!" he chuckled and kissed her. "Mhm…I missed that…" Carol whispered while she was still kissing him back. "Oh really?" Doug asked chuckling, not letting her go.

"Hm…hm…" Kate cleared her throat and her parents parted. "Sorry for interrupting, but we're thirsty and there's no limo in the kitchen!" the girl yawned and blinked because her eyes weren't used to the light. Doug grinned at his daughter. "I guess I have to go downstairs to get something then…" he said and Kate nodded. "Would be great, dad." "I'm going to take a shower and go to bed then. And you girlies should go to bed too! You don't want to fall asleep while the fireworks tomorrow, don't you…" Carol said. "Yeah mum…" her daughter said, too tired to talk with her mum.

Doug came back with the limo and Kate followed him to the kitchen, where Tess was already waiting.

"Thanks dad…" they both said when Doug handed them the glasses. "Oh…C'mon girls…let's go to bed!" Doug suggested and the twins drank out their glasses. "Good idea!" Tess said and the three went upstairs. "Night dad…" Tess said when she fell back to her bed. "Love you…" Kate said and she soon was in bed too. Doug chuckled. "I love you both!" he answered and closed the door before he followed Carol into the shower.

The next day Carol got up before everyone else. She went downstairs to cook some coffee and getting something to eat but looking into the fridge she found out that they didn't have anything left, not even milk. "Well great…" she murmured, knowing that grocery shopping on December 31st wasn't the best idea…but it had to be necessary.

Within ten minutes she was ready to go out of the house. It was beautiful this morning, the sun was coming through the clouds and the snow was glittering in it. The lake was frozen at the shore and some ducks were swimming along edge of the ice. Carol realized once more that she never could leave this place.

The grocery store around the corner was full with people. Carol rolled her eyes and she hoped that there was something left for her in the shelves.

"Carol! How was your holiday?" Mrs. Garber, one of their neighbors, asked smiling. "Good morning Mrs. Garber! It was beautiful but very cold and snowy!" Carol answered with a fake smile, not in the mood to talk right now. "You often hear that about Chicago…how's your family doing?" the old lady asked again. Carol took a deep breath. "Everybody's fine…look, I'm in a hurry and I need to get something for breakfast. See you soon!" she said and started to go away. "Happy new year to you and your family!" Mrs. Garber called after her and Carol turned around. "Happy new year to you too, Mrs. Garber!"

When she finally arrived back home with all the stuff, Doug came downstairs, rubbing his eyes. "Where have you been?" he asked astonished. "Grocery shopping. The fridge was empty!" Carol answered, putting everything away in the kitchen. "And you carried that all by yourself?" Doug asked again. Carol turned around to him. "Of course…I was there alone, remember?" she said, shaking her head. "And why couldn't you wait? You're not supposed to carry all that stuff alone!" Doug got louder. Carol turned her eyes. "Well, nothing happened! I'm fine!" she countered back. "Did you even think about it? Do you even care?" he asked calmly. She simply did too much…cleaning in the house was enough already but carrying these heavy things was way too much.

Carol looked at him with a shocked face, not believing that he just asked that. They stayed there for many seconds without saying a word. "I love our baby, Doug!" Carol finally said as tears formed in her eyes. "Never accuse me of not caring again!"

With that she grabbed her coat and her hat and stormed out of the house.

Doug couldn't believe it. She knew how risky every little thing was. Jane said it more than often. Why couldn't she just hold back…she was so careful in Chicago and now that they were at home, she was doing such a stupid thing. He shook his head while he poured the fresh coffee she just made into his cup, knowing that she would come back and recognize her mistake.

Was he overreacting? She always said that she felt great; she had a good appetite and not even morning sickness. But he was so scared. So scared to lose her or the baby…or both. He never was more afraid before. He loved her so much that it hurt, seeing her doing things she shouldn't do. It hurt so much, knowing that he couldn't help her if something would happen.

Doug thought about this one night and he smiled suddenly, remembering how much fun they had. They were drinking wine, joking about something silly and he remembered how much he loved her laugh, her smile. And then he just couldn't control himself. He wanted to feel her, to be in her arms, to soak in her scent, to kiss her. He had no idea that Carol forgot to take the pill that night…and then they made a baby. Their baby. The only thing he knew that they made passionate love that night and that was what mattered. And he knew that Carol loved the baby as much as he did.

Was he really thinking that she didn't care about the baby inside her? Carol couldn't believe it. She loved this baby very much. She even thought about names already or how it would look like. How could he think that she didn't care about it? Just because she went grocery shopping? Carol shook her head and she watched the lake, as she sat in the chair on the dock, her feet crossed in front of her to be safe from the cold. Frustrated she got her cell phone out of her coat and dialed Regan's number.

"Hey stranger!" Regan said and Carol knew that she was smiling; you could hear it in her voice.

"Hey Reg! Thanks for your lovely message!" Carol answered, smiling too. "We missed you too!"

"Don't lie to me! How was Chicago?"

"Exciting. We got a job offer from an old colleague!"

"Oh, but you didn't take it, right? You're not going back to Chicago?"

"No Reg. Don't worry…"

"But what's up? You sound so…sad?"

Carol sighed. "Had a fight with Doug…"

"What? Trouble in paradise?"

"He's kinda pissed because I went grocery shopping this morning. I shouldn't carry heavy things but I bought milk, bread, meat and bottles of limo…"

"I'd be pissed too…"

"Thanks Regan!"

"C'mon Carol, you know he's worried…he loves you and the baby and he doesn't want to lose you!"

"Yeah…I know…"

"Sooo?"

"I only went grocery shopping…this is driving me crazy! Am I still allowed to breath?"

"Carol?"

"Yes mother, I'm going to tell him that I'm sorry!"

"Good girl. Don't you understand him? Just a little bit?"

"Of course I understand him…it's just…I'm not used to his overprotection…"

"You HAVE to step back Carol. Next time you'll go shopping with him. Or with your girls so they can help you carry everything."

"Okay."

"Okay. And now go tell him that you love him and that you don't want to fight!" Regan smiled.

"I will…hey, what are you doing tonight?"

"We have no plans. We decided to watch TV…y'know, old movies and then Time Square…"

"Wanna come over here? Doug bought fireworks for the girls…and we still didn't meet Connor!"

"I don't wanna bother you Carol…"

"You're not. We can have fondue since I bought meat today!"

"Mhmmm that sounds good. I'm going to ask Connor and call you when everything is okay!"

"Alright then!"

"It's good that you're back!"

"So good to hear that!"

"Okay. I have to go now. Talk to you later"

"See you"

Doug looked out of the window and he saw her sitting on the dock, looking out on the lake. He knew that this was her favorite place to save energy, to retire.

She didn't turn around when he was going out to her but she smiled a little when she heard his steps on the wood. He bent down in front of her. "I'm sorry…I didn't mean to yell at you…" he said, biting his lip as he looked to her. Carol looked down to him and smiled. "You don't have to apologize, Doug. It was my mistake…I know I'm stupid, doing all that things. It's just…I need to get used to it, y'know? I felt so great lately…sometimes I just forget that I'm not allowed to do stuff. But I do care, Doug. I love that baby, I do care about it!" she answered and Doug wiped away a single tear from her cheek. "I know." "I don't want to fight…I love you!" she said and he got up to kiss her. "I love you, too!"

Finally she smiled again, happy that this was spoken out. "Hey…Regan and Conner are coming over today…we need to prepare for dinner!" Doug smiled. "Great. Can't wait to meet Mr. Lawyer!" Doug answered laughing.

Doug and Carol spent the whole afternoon in the kitchen to prepare for the meeting with Regan and Conner. Finally they rang around 8 in the evening and Carol opened the door. "Hey guys!" she smiled and hugged Regan. "Aww…look at you!" Regan answered and they separated. Carol looked to the good looking man beside Regan. "Hi…I'm Carol, nice to meet you!" she said and they shook hands. "Nice to meet you! I'm Connor! I heard a lot about you!" he answered smiling.

"Hopefully just good things! Hi, I'm Doug!" Doug said when he came back from the cellar where he got a bottle of whine. "Ah, so this is the famous Dr. Ross!" Conner smiled. Doug chuckled. "Famous…again?" Carol asked and she looked to Doug. He only shrugged smiling.

Regan and Connor also said hi to the twins until they finally started the fondue. They talked about this and that, how Regan and Connor met, his job and about the trip to Chicago. When they were finished, Regan got up to help Doug in the kitchen.

"So…what do you think?" she asked. Doug chuckled. "About Connor?" he asked and she nodded. "Well…I think he's totally in love with you!" Doug answered, smiling in her direction. "How do you know that?" Regan asked. "Just look at him…he's looking at you all the time, he's touching your hand and smiling at you…you're a lucky girl, Reg!"

Regan smiled, happy to hear that words from Doug. "I hope you're right Doug…he's awesome, we have so much fun…!" Doug chuckled again. "And you're in love too. That's what matters. But I tell you…if he's a bad guy to you, I'm going to break his neck!"

Regan laughed and threw the towel to him.

"Your house is beautiful! The view is amazing here!" Connor said to Carol, looking out of the big living room window that showed the view out on the lake. "Yeah, it is! When did you move to Seattle?" Carol asked. "Three years ago…because of work. I started a new firm here!" Connor answered proudly. "Wow, that's quite something! So…Regan, huh?" Carol started the topic with a smile. Connor grinned. "Yeah…she's great!" he answered. "She's my best friend" Carol answered. "I know. I'm not going to hurt her. She's a wonderful person. I'd be stupid to let her go!" Connor answered, thinking about his girlfriend. Carol was satisfied with this. She felt that this was going to be a strong relationship that could last forever.

Finally they got ready to go out on the deck and the twins were excited for the fireworks. Every now and then they saw some around the lake. Ten seconds before midnight the adults started the countdown, while Doug started to light their own fireworks.

Exactly on midnight he lit them and the twins jumped up and down and Doug went to Carol to kiss her. "Happy new year baby!" she said smiling and kissed him again, before she went to her daughters.

Regan hugged Connor and kissed him too. "I love you!" he said and Regan suddenly looked at him shocked. She wasn't prepared for this. But finally she smiled and answered with an "I love you, too!"

Then all the friends hugged and wished everyone a happy new year and Carol whispered into Regan's ear: "Thanks for being our friend!"


	15. Chapter 15

AN: Sorry it took me so long for this. I was really busy. Hope you enjoy that one!

* * *

**Chapter 15 – ****Hope**

The next months went by unspectacular. Doug went back to work and the twins had to go to school again. Carol learned to do nothing. Really nothing. But she was so bored all the time…she couldn't wait until these last two months would be over. "Wow", she thought, "only two months to go…" as she was lying on the couch and knitting a pullover that nobody would wear anyways.

She smiled when she felt the baby kick inside her stomach. "Hey baby…do you have fun in there?" she said and chuckled.

When she felt her baby kick the first time she almost started to cry. It was a wonderful feeling which she had almost forgotten; it had been 11 years since her last pregnancy after all. And Doug being there, his hand on her stomach, was the most amazing thing in the world.

Her visits at Jane's office always were positive. The baby developed great and so did Carol.

Carol, Doug and the twins also went shopping for baby stuff; they needed a new stroller, clothes and the twins insisted to buy toys.

But everything changed three days later. Carol hasn't felt the baby kick since that last time on the couch. Something was definitely wrong and she was scared like hell. She didn't feel sick, she didn't feel tired or anything, but she didn't feel the baby…it had been two days and Carol really started to worry. She didn't tell Doug about it; maybe she was just wrong and didn't notice the kicks. She would wait one day longer.

At night Carol woke up from a bad dream and she had the urge to go to the toilet. And that's when she felt the pain. "Oh God…no…" she thought when she curled up in bed because of the pain. Doug woke up noticing the stirring in bed. When he saw her crying he jumped up. "Care…what's up?" "I need to go to the hospital!" she cried, looking at him, scared. Doug closed his eyes but got up immediately to put on his jeans and a t-shirt. "I'm going to wake up the twins!" he said and was out of the room. "No…no…no!" Carol whined. This couldn't be true.

Half an hour later they arrived at the hospital. Carol was pale like a ghost and Doug couldn't think straight. The twins were scared like hell. This was like in a horror movie.

"Jane!" Doug shouted when he saw her disappearing around the corner. She turned around and her smile faded away. "What the hell?" she said and ran to them. "I need help…" Carol said calmly, too calmly.

Carol was on the examine chair when Jane started with the ultrasound. "Oh…" she murmured and got up, throwing her gloves away. "What?" Carol asked, scared about the answer. "I see no heartbeat. We're going to make an emergency c-section!" Jane answered, knowing that now everything could change forever. Her heart was beating like hell…she never thought that this would get so close to her. But Carol was her friend and she'd do everything to safe her. She started to pray to God silently. Carol didn't say a word, but the tears ran down her cheeks like a waterfall. It was like she fell back eleven years…she felt exactly the same like she did before Kate was born.

There was no time for a PDA, so she couldn't be awake while the c-section. Everything was prepared already and she was wheeled into the OR. Doug was always on her side. "Doug?" she said silently again and he looked at her. "Promise me that you'll be there for the girls…"

"Oh no…don't start with that Care!" he answered, not ready for this. If this would be the last talk they had…no. He didn't even want to think about this. "Doug, promise me. I love you. I love you so much. Please…promise me!" she started to cry, although she knew that she couldn't change anything…she just wasn't ready for this. Doug died inside. This was all wrong; this wasn't how it was supposed to be. She did so great all these months, why this now? "Care…don't leave me!" he said and now he couldn't hold back his tears. "Promise me, Doug…don't leave Tess and Kate…" "I promise, Carol. I promise!" was all he could say before she closed her eyes and fell into a deep sleep. And then it was Doug who started to pray silently.

Doug scrubbed in, he wanted to be with her while the operation; he couldn't just sit outside and wait. He needed to be with her. "Jane…" he said when he found her preparing for the c-section. "Oh Doug…" she said and she hugged him. "What happened?" she asked. Doug shrugged. "Everything was okay…but tonight she woke up with pain…"

"It will be okay, Doug. She's going to be okay!" Jane said, although she didn't know if. But she would do all she could. Doug nodded, praying to God that she was right.

Carol looked like a fallen angel, like she did when she found out that she was pregnant. "I'm going to start now…" Jane said and she noticed how much her hand was shaking. Taking a deep breath under her mask she put the scalpel on Carol's stomach. The blood was running down and Doug closed his eyes, telling Carol that he loved her in his thoughts. "Don't leave me…don't leave me!" he whispered to her and he started to think about all the happy times he shared with her. He saw her coming down to the deck when she came to Seattle. He saw her on their wedding day, how beautiful she was then. He saw her playing with Tess and Kate, cuddling them. He saw her smiling. And that's what he needed to see.

"It's a girl!" Jane interrupted his thoughts and she held the little baby up so that he could see her. The baby was so small…too small; it missed two months in the stomach of her mother. And although she was small and her skin was transparent, Doug could already see her beauty; this was his daughter, he was there when she was born and now he wished that she would let out a cry, just to show him that she was here, that she would stay with her family. But the baby didn't cry. Doug got up and went to the table, where his daughter was examined by Doug's colleague Dr. Small. "Is she breathing?" he asked and Robert shook his head. He was about to do an intubation when Doug bent down to his daughter, stroking her tiny head. "Hey baby…I love you. Show me that you're here…I'm here for you. Don't go away without saying hello…don't do that to us! I love you!" he told her and then they waited for some seconds.

It was like a wonder. The monitor started to beep and Doug looked up, noticing that the baby had a heartbeat. Jane smiled and took a deep breath when she looked to Doug. Doug's face lit up. His daughter was here. Robert quickly started to intubate the baby to help her breath and then everything went too quickly…she suddenly was brought away.

Carol. He went back to her. "Jane?" he asked slowly and she shook her head. "Jane?" he asked again, now louder than he wanted. "I can't stop the bleeding!" she shouted back, frustrated. "Do something! Save her!" "Doug…you should go to your daughter!" Jane said, now calmly again. "I'm not going anywhere now Jane!" he answered, bending down to Carol's head. "Don't you dare leave me now, Carol! I need you. The girls need you. We have a beautiful baby daughter, Carol. Don't leave!" he said to her, hoping that she would hear him. "I love you…" he said, over and over again and then he closed his eyes and laid his head beside hers.

Tess and Kate were ready to see their sister and they went with Doug to the ICU. The girl was in an incubator, attached to machines that helped her to survive. "Wow…she's so small…" Kate said as she laid her hands on the box and looked inside. Tess smiled a little. "She's 1.3 feet small and has only 5.2 pounds…" Doug said, looking at his newborn daughter. "And she'll be alright?" Tess asked, looking at him concerned. "Hopefully…" was all he could say. The girls noticed that he was crying a little bit. "Oh daddy…" Kate said and she hugged him. Tess joined her and there they stood, not knowing what the future would bring. "Does she have a name yet?" Tess asked then and Doug shook his head. "Not yet. We haven't decided about it…" he answered, looking to the baby again and asking himself what they did wrong that this could've been happening.

_**AN**__: Sooo, the baby is here, but too early…too bad I have no idea what exactly happens to babies that come too early…but I hope you liked this chapter!_


	16. Chapter 16

_AN: Sorry this took me so long, but I really had a hard time at work and all...but now it's finally here! Hope you like it!_

**Chapter 16 – ****Stevie**

Jane, Regan, Doug and the twins were sitting together in the cafeteria to chill out after what happened. Doug just finished phoning their mothers to tell the news about the baby. "So…what about a name, Doug?" Regan asked when everybody was silent. Doug shook his head. "We haven't decided about it yet…I mean…there were still two months left…" he answered and sighed. "But haven't you talked about it?" Jane asked. Doug nodded. "Carol named the baby every day. But mostly boy names…" he answered again and put his head in his hands. Jane nodded. "Do you have favorite names, girls?" Jane asked the twins then. Tess and Kate just shrugged. "I like Lane a lot!" Kate said. "I like Jamie!" Tess said. Doug smiled a little. "Those are nice names…" Jane answered. "I won't decide without Carol" Doug mentioned, looking up again. "Of course. She'll wake up soon!" Jane said, stroking over his shoulders. "So…four girls in your home now, Doug. Will you survive this?" Regan asked then, just to bring some fun into the conversation. Doug chuckled. "I think a lot of men are jealous now!" "It's great that we have a sister. She can have all our things then…" Tess said smiling. "But only the things we don't need anymore!" Kate finished and Tess nodded, turning her eyes. "Of course…what would a baby do with a Nintendo Wii?" she asked but Kate just threw a silly face to her sister. Doug smiled at them, happy that they were here; happy that they were his daughters.

Doug excused himself later; he needed to go to Carol. He wanted to be there when she would wake up. When he entered the room he smiled in relief. Her stomach was moving up and down and that was the most important thing right now. He took a seat on the chair beside her bed and smiled at how often he had done that the last few months. But she was alive. She didn't leave him. Doug never was more scared than this day. What would he do without her? How should he survive without his soul mate? He didn't want his kids to grow up without their mother. He didn't want the baby not remembering its mother. He was thinking all of that today but now seeing her body move made him happy. Knowing that she would be okay and that their baby would be okay was the best that could happen. Silently, he thanked God for his life with Carol and his daughters.

When Carol woke up from the narcosis she thought she had to suffocate. Gasping for breath she sat up in the bed, taking deep breaths several times. "Oh God…" she murmured after some seconds, finally calming down again. Doug just sat there, smiling from one ear to the other; he didn't say a word, but his expression showed that he was the happiest man in the world right now.  
"Doug…what happened?" she asked scared, looking at him. He took her hand and continued to smile. "You didn't leave me and the kids…" he said. Carol closed her eyes, still tired. "What about the baby, Doug?" she finally asked. She remembered dreaming about it but she didn't know if it survived or not. "She'll be fine…she's" Doug started but Carol interrupted her. "We have a daughter again?" she asked, finally smiling too. "We have daughter. She's beautiful. She's really small, but she already has dark hair!" Doug told her proudly. Tears started to form in Carol's eyes and they slowly ran down her cheeks. "Oh God…is she healthy? Will she be okay? No remaining damages?" she asked again, knowing the risks about premature births. "She will be okay Carol. It just needs time. She's in an incubator for some time now. She's going to be okay!" Doug promised her. "I wanna see her! I wanna see our baby!" Carol said, taking his hand and kissing it.

"You can't see her right now", Jane said, coming into the room with the twins. Shyly they looked to their mother. "Babies…come here, I'm fine!" Carol smiled to them, wiping away her tears but they didn't stop. Tess and Kate smiled too, going to their mum and hugging her. "I love you both, so much!" Carol whispered stroking their heads. "Love you too, mum!" Tess said. "Me too!" Kate said and she started to cry. "Baby…why are you crying?" Carol asked. "All of this is my fault…and don't tell me I'm wrong!" Kate answered frustrated. "Katherine Sarah Ross, I never…NEVER want to hear that again! You were a baby and things like the spinal cord around the baby's neck happen! Nothing of this is your fault!" Carol told her daughter again and she hugged her. "Okay", Kate answered. "Okay?" Carol asked again, fresh tears forming in her eyes and Kate nodded. "And you…thank you for saving my life…and the baby's life!" Carol no said to Jane. Jane smiled. "Carol…I…", Jane started but Carol cut her off. "You had to do a hysterectomy!" "How do you know that?" Jane asked, going to Carol's bed. "I think I knew it somehow…since…" she stopped and looked to Tess and Kate. Jane nodded, turning around to go. "Wait!" Carol shouted. "Why can't I see my baby?" Jane turned around again. "She's intubated. And you're not allowed to get up that soon, you just had a surgery." "Then I'll need a wheelchair. I want to see my daughter!"

They passed the nursery and Carol looked in, wishing her baby could be in there; wishing her baby was in her stomach for nine months; wishing she had a normal birth. When they arrived at the ICU she suddenly felt dizzy. Fear overwhelmed her; she wasn't prepared for this. Doug opened the door and then he wheeled her in. Carol closed her eyes, wishing that this was just a dream. "Here she is", he interrupted her thoughts and she opened her eyes, seeing this little baby in front of her. Her daughter had a tube coming out her mouth, she was attached to the machines, and her diaper was too big for her. Carol saw her tiny fingers, her tiny toes. "Oh God", she said, covering her mouth with her hand, when the tears started again. She couldn't be there; this wasn't supposed to happen. She didn't want to be that type of a mother, who needed to visit their baby in an incubator. She didn't want her baby to be attached to all those machines. This wasn't right.  
"I need to get out of here…" she managed to say and Doug looked at her shocked. "Care…", he started, not believing that she didn't want to be here; that she didn't want to see her daughter. "Please…get me out of here!" Carol interrupted him and he wheeled her out again, not understanding her at all.

When Carol was in her bed again, Doug got back to his daughter. "I'm sorry, baby. She'll come back, I promise!" he told her, not knowing if she could hear him. He put his hand through the opening and stroked over her tiny hand when he let the tears come that he held back for so long. "I love you, little one!" he said, wishing that Carol felt the same.  
"I bet she already knows her daddy!" Regan said when she came in. Doug looked up to her, wiping away his tears. "I hope so…she's beautiful, isn't she?" he answered, looking at the baby again. Regan nodded. "She is! What about Carol, Doug?" Doug looked at her again and shrugged. "She was here some minutes before…but she wanted to get out; she didn't even touch her or anything", Doug told her. Regan took a deep breath. "I'm sure she'll change her mind. This just takes time…" she answered and Doug nodded, hoping she was right.

When he came back to Carol's room, he didn't know if he was angry with her or if he was just sad. He just couldn't believe that she didn't want to see her daughter. He took a seat on the chair beside Carol's bed again and watched her sleeping. She was so beautiful and all he knew was that he loved her, no matter what. And then he didn't even realize when he fell asleep too.

"Doug…" Carol murmured when she woke up. She looked beside her and saw him, happy that he was here. "I love you…so much!" she whispered, knowing that she made a mistake earlier. "I think I'm ready now!" she now said louder and Doug woke up. "What?" he asked, taking her hand. "I'm ready to see her now. For real", Carol answered again and Doug finally smiled. "What was going on in there?" Doug asked. He just couldn't believe that Carol didn't want to be with her newborn daughter. Carol sighed. "I don't know…I was scared!" she said. "I…I don't want to be such a mum who has to visit her baby in an incubator…she still needed two months, Doug! Why? I'm so scared, Doug!" she started to cry again and Doug put his hands on her face. "She's going to be okay, Care!" he said and kissed her. "Thanks for being there for her the first time!" Carol now said, calming down again and Doug nodded. "Now let's go to her again! She has to meet her mommy!" he said and Carol nodded with a weak smile on her face.

Carol sat in front of the incubator, putting a hand on the glass. "I'm…I'm sorry because of earlier…" she whispered to her baby. "You're beautiful…I love you!"  
"She needs a name!" Doug said behind her and she looked back to him. "What do you have in mind?" Carol asked silently. "No…I already named our first daughter and Mark named our second daughter…I think it's your turn now!" Doug answered smiling. Carol looked to the baby again. "Yesterday, her name was Stevie", she said, remembering how she named her baby this day. "Stevie Ross…I like that!" Doug said, kneeling down to Carol. "Any middle name?" he asked. "Jane. I wanna name her Jane, since she saved her life…is that okay for you?" Carol asked, taking his hand. Doug nodded. "Totally!" Carol smiled and stroked over his cheek until she leaned forward and kissed him. "I'm sorry because of earlier, Doug!" she whispered and he nodded. "I know. It's okay".  
Carol looked to her daughter again and now she finally put her hand in the opening to touch her, to feel her soft skin. "Welcome on board, Stevie Jane Ross!" she said, finally smiling, finally happy that everything would be okay.

Tess and Kate were wondering about the name of the baby. "I really hope she gets a middle name, like we did!" Kate said, rolling her eyes. "Oh yeah, totally...it would be unfair, if she didn't get one!" Tess answered nodding. "Well, she did get a middle name!" Doug said when he came to his girls, hearing about their conversation. "So tell us her name!" Kate begged and Doug smiled. "Stevie Jane!" he answered proudly. Kate looked to Tess shocked. "That's a boy name!" Tess complained but Doug shook his head. "It's not. Your mum wanted to give her this name and I think it's a great name…Stevie, it's cute, in my opinion!" he answered and stroke over Tess' hair. "You're right. It's great…and I'm glad she has a middle name!" Kate laughed and Tess joined her. "Yeah totally!"


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 1****7 - Smile**

After one week Carol was released from the hospital, but it was hard to go without her baby. Before she was leaving with Doug, she was in the ICU again, telling her daughter by touching her hand that she'll be back soon. The tears streamed down her face like they always did, when she saw Stevie lying in the incubator, still attached to the machines, still inthubated. Carol still wasn't able to hold her daughter but she so desperately wanted to have her in her arms, to smell her baby scent, to kiss her. She couldn't wait for the first time.

Doug visited his daughter every day before he had to go to work, talking with Robert about her condition, about her medicaments, about further steps. But nothing really changed; they still had to wait.

Carol almost went crazy at home. The twins were back to school and all she could think about was Stevie. Some days ago her mother phoned and Carol broke down in tears, telling Helen that she was never scared more in her life.

Every day when the twins got back from school, they drove to the hospital to visit Stevie, but it got harder every day. Carol didn't want to leave her again. She just wished she could grab her and go home with her.

Three weeks later they still had not much news. Stevie still wasn't breathing all on her own, but she developed great. She looked almost like a normal baby already, just smaller.

Carol heard the phone ringing when she was cooking dinner. "Girls…can you get it?" she called to the twins who were doing their homework in the living room.

"Mum, it's Jane!" Kate called back and Carol looked up. She noticed her heart beating faster. She almost ran into the living room, getting the phone from Kate. "Jane?" she breathed out. "Hey Carol! Good news, we're going to extubate Stevie today!"

"What? Really? Are you sure? It isn't too early?" Carol's eyes lit up and she looked to her girls smiling.

"She's breathing all on her own already…we didn't notice a failure since yesterday morning. Stevie's ready and I think you should come here!"

Carol closed her eyes. A stone fell from her heart. "Mum?" Tess asked, noticing her smiling. "Stevie…we have to go to the hospital!" Carol told her. "Jane…are you really sure? Isn't it too soon? I…I'm…"

"Carol…we are sure. Doug is here".

"Carol?" he asked when Jane gave him the phone.

"Hey…"

"Come over here. Bring Tess and Kate. Over and out!"

Carol hung up and she went to the twins to hug them. She laughed in happiness, while tears formed in her eyes. "Mum…what's going on?" Kate asked chuckling. "Stevie will be extubated soon. We should go now!" Carol answered, not leaving her daughters. "Well…then get up! Let's go mum!" Tess laughed and Carol kissed both of their cheeks. It finally was time.

Regan waited with the twins outside, while Jane, Carol and Doug were inside the ICU. Jane opened the incubator and she disconnected the baby from all the machines. Carol's heart was beating like hell, she was so nervous. Doug squeezed her hand with a big smile on his face. Carol wished she could be as optimistic as he was.

Jane laid the baby on the little examine table. "Hey baby…" Carol whispered and Doug stroke Stevie's head that was full with hair already. "I'll start now!" Jane said and she got everything ready to pull out the tube from Stevie's neck. "Okay", Doug said, watching everything she did. Carol's body was shaking and she took a deep breath, like it would help her baby to breath.

When Jane finally pulled out the tube, Stevie let out her first loud cry, like she was telling everybody that she was here now. "Oh God…" Carol whispered and she smiled at Doug and both had tears in their eyes. Carol hugged Doug and kissed him, stroking over his cheeks, happy that her daughter was crying. "Thank you, Jane. So much! Thanks for everything!" Carol now said to her friend who was smiling at them. "You're welcome. I'm happy for you!" Jane answered and she hugged Carol. "Wanna hold her now?" she asked and Carol's eyes lit up. She nodded, not able to speak. "Get your shirt off. Stevie will need the warmth of your skin!" Jane said and Carol did so, sitting down on the chair beside them. Doug went outside to tell Tess and Kate to come in; to welcome their sister in their life. Regan joined them; she didn't want to miss anything.

So they all sat there, watching as Jane brought the baby to Carol and laying Stevie on Carol's chest. Carol now couldn't stop her tears anymore, realizing that she held her newborn daughter for the very first time. Jane laid a blanket over Stevie, so she didn't have to freeze, but Carol never let her hand go from her baby. Doug bent down to her. "She's beautiful!" he whispered and smiled at his wife. Carol nodded. "And she's smiling! Look!" she answered and turned so that everybody could see the little smile on Stevie's face. Tess and Kate were happy and smiling too as Regan hugged them and kissed their foreheads. Carol kissed Doug again, loving him more than ever and knowing that now everything would be okay.

One week afterwards Stevie finally could go home from the hospital. Doug, Carol, Tess and Kate drove to the hospital on a warm Sunday and they couldn't wait to take Stevie home. "Can I hold her then?" Tess asked when they entered the hospital. "Get in line, missy! It's my turn now! You held her yesterday!" Kate answered. Carol and Doug smiled at their daughters, wondering if they would ever stop fighting about their sister. "You know what, she'll be in her carrier, so nobody will hold her!" Doug said chuckling and the twins rolled their eyes.

"Oh…so today's the day, huh? No sleeping through the night, full, stinky diapers…" Regan joked when she saw the Ross/Hathaway family. Doug grinned. "Oh yeah, that's going to be fun!" he answered, thinking about this. He couldn't wait to get up in the night for his baby…he never got the chance before. "Okay, I wish you all good luck. I have to run now. Connor's waiting for me!" Regan said and she disappeared again.

Finally Stevie was ready to go home. "Oh look at her…the clothes are still too big!" Carol smiled, holding her daughter. Jane signed the chart and looked up to Doug, Carol and the twins. "So, that's it. I'm going to miss her!" she smiled and stroke over the baby's head. "Is the fever gone already?" Doug asked and Carol looked at him surprised. "She's had fever?" Jane nodded. "Yesterday evening but it's all gone now. Just check it in the evening again! And now…good luck with your baby girl. I have to go now. Bye honey!" Jane kissed the baby's cheek and waved to the others. "They're all in a hurry today…" Kate said and she looked around confused.

"Did you plan on telling me about the fever?" Carol asked when they were on the way back. "Care…I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I don't want you to be worried…" "She's my daughter, too. I want to know everything!" Carol answered. Doug nodded. "Okay", he answered and smiled, "sorry I didn't tell you."

"Carol! Do you have a minute?" Sherry asked when she came around the corner and saw them. Carol looked to Doug. "It's okay…just tell me everything from now on, okay?" Carol asked and Doug nodded. He kissed her. "I love you. We're going to wait in the car!" he said and he went out with Stevie and the twins.

Carol turned around to Sherry, not knowing what would come now. Maybe she had a problem with the nurses' schedule or something. Sherry smiled shyly at Carol. "First I wanted to tell you congratulations on the baby!" Sherry started and Carol smiled. "Thanks." "And…I'm sorry that I've been such a jerk all the time…I'm just…" Sherry continued but Carol interrupted her. "Sherry…it's okay. Really…don't think about it!" Carol smiled and turned around to go. "Thanks Carol…when are you coming back?" Sherry asked again. Carol shrugged. "I have no idea…but you're doing a great job!" Carol answered and Sherry nodded. Carol was satisfied to let out the boss in her for a moment but somehow she couldn't believe that Sherry changed that much.

Finally she was back at the car and they were driving home. "Stevie is smiling again!" Kate said and Carol turned around. She looked into the smiling faces of her three daughters. "I bet she's happy to go home with us!" Carol answered and she smiled too, putting her hand on Doug's lap.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18 – Regan**

Later that night Carol woke up from Stevie's crying. She smiled at that sound…she really was a happy mother. Just as she wanted to get up, Doug held her back. "I'm going!"

Carol closed her eyes and smiled again, realizing that Doug was here and doing all the things he missed with Tess and Kate. You could see in his eyes that he was so happy.

"I think somebody here is hungry!" he whispered when he came back with Stevie on his arm, who was sucking on his finger. Carol got up and smiled. "The bar is open!" she said and Doug placed Stevie into Carol's arms.

"Wow, she's really hungry!" Carol laughed, stroking the baby's head. "I bet she wants to get big and strong!" Doug answered looking at them. "I love you, Doug!" Carol said when she looked back at him and smiled. "I love you too!" he answered and kissed her.

Earlier that night Regan waited nervously in her living room for Connor to come home from work. Although she didn't exactly know if she really was pregnant, she wanted to tell him about it. On her way back from Carol she already imagined her life with a baby. She saw herself pregnant and then Connor with their baby on his arm. She saw her kid playing with Stevie and Carol and herself laughing with them. 'Oh wow…I'm going to be a mum' she thought and she smiled. Not a bad thought.

"Hey babe!" Connor said when he came home and he found Regan in the living room. "Hey…" she said shyly, "we need to talk!" Connor looked at her concerned. "Oh, that sounds serious!" he said, sitting down opposite of her. "It kinda is…" she answered, smiling a little. "You're not breaking up with me, are you?" he immediately asked but Regan shook her head. "No. No…but I hope you don't do after hearing the news!" Regan answered, taking a deep breath. "So what? You know you can tell me everything!" "Okay Connor." Once again she took a deep breath, thinking about the words she would say. Connor just looked at her, waiting to hear the news. "Okay. Babe…" she leaned forward and touched his knees, "there is a possibility that I might be pregnant." Regan finished her words and she looked into his eyes, her heart was racing. Connor looked at her as if she was a ghost, but didn't say anything. "Con?" Regan asked again and he nodded, taking her face into his hands. "Wow", a little smile appeared on his lips. "I didn't expect that…" he said and kissed her passionately. "Okay, but what do you think?" Regan asked laughing. "I think it would be wonderful to have a baby with you!" he laughed back and Regan saw that he wasn't lying. "Oh I love you!" she said and she kissed him again, happy that he wasn't going to run away from her. "I love you too baby!" he answered and they hugged, both happy about their future.

The next day Carol opened the door with a crying Stevie on her arm and she looked into a happy, smiling face. "Hey…c'mon in!" Carol sighed and Regan got in, still smiling. "Hey…what's so bad, little girly?" Regan said in a baby voice and took Stevie from Carol. Stevie immediately stopped to cry. Carol put her hands on her hips. "Now look at that! You're a natural!" Carol said happy. "She was sleeping and my mum rang…she didn't like that!" "Nooo you don't like the noise, nooo", Regan said to Stevie again but she already had her eyes closed. "She looks a lot like you, y'know…" Regan now said and she laid Stevie back into the bouncy chair. Carol nodded. "That's just because of the hair! So, ready for the test?" Regan shrugged. "I don't know, am I?" Regan asked back, now getting nervous again. Carol rolled her eyes. "Just pee on the stripe!" she said and led Regan to the toilet. "You know, I told Connor about it!" Regan said from inside. "What? What did he say?" Carol asked back. "He's happy!" The door got open and Regan came out with the stripe in her hand. "And he said that I'm the only woman he wants to have kids with!"

"Aww…that's awesome! I'm really happy for you! Now, go wash your hands!" Carol hugged her. "Yes mum!" Regan joked and she went to the bathroom.

"Are the five minutes over already?" Regan asked anxiously because Carol wouldn't let her see the test. "Only two more minutes!" Carol yawned. "Tired?" Regan asked and Carol nodded with a smile. "Oh, I see. This isn't just Stevie's fault, right?" Carol, still smiling, shook her head without looking at Regan. "Wow…you know, this is so awesome…I mean, how long are you two married now? Eight years?" Carol's best friend asked and Carol nodded. "Yes…eight years!" she answered and started to think back all these years. "I still remember when I first met him…feels like it was yesterday…" Carol started to dream and Regan looked at her smiling. "Please tell me about it…I want to know everything!" she shined like a little girl. Carol smiled and leaned back and then she started with her story. How she met Doug the first time; about their first date; which wasn't exactly a date; about her two year long on and off relationship with him; about her suicide attempt; about Tag; about Tatiana; about Linda Farrell, about the almost-wedding; about Shep; about her thought of studying medicine; about the growing friendship with Doug; the surprise birthday party he threw for her; the night when she got back together with Doug; how afraid she was then, but how much she loved him over all the years; his proposal; the kiss with Greg; how much she hurt Doug; how everything got okay again; she told Regan about the night when they decided to have a baby; about her worries of not getting pregnant; how they met Ricky Abott and his mum and how much shit happened after this; about Doug leaving, about her wanting to die again; about her finding out she was pregnant and telling Doug about it and that's when Regan interrupted her. "You know that this was really stupid back then!" Carol let out a laugh. "I know…it was more than stupid because I still loved him but I was so hurt!" she answered, wanting to forget this year. "You should've come with him the first time!" Regan stated and Carol sighed. "I know…" was all she could say. If she could, she would turn back time and make everything different. But this wasn't possible, so she had to live with it. "Oh baby…I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you!" Reagan said as she noticed a tear running down Carol's cheek. She didn't even notice that she was crying. "It's not your fault…I just…I didn't think that this still hurts so much…" Carol answered and wiped away her tears. "Now let's look if you're pregnant!" she added, realizing that more than two minutes went by. Regan closed her eyes, not really ready to hear the news and still sorry that her friend had to go through all this shit. Carol was right…it hasn't always been a fairytale.

"Regan baby…" Carol said, holding the test in her hand and Regan looked up at her. "Congratulations! You're pregnant!" With a smile, she showed the pregnancy test to Regan. Regan just glared at it, covering her mouth with her hand. "Oh my God…I'm really pregnant…" she murmured and looked back to Carol, who immediately hugged her friend. "I'm so happy for you! You're having a little baby!" Regan started to laugh and she couldn't hold back her tears anymore. "Thank you Care…I'm having a baby!"

After all the tears dried Regan left Carol and Stevie alone again. She wanted to tell the news to Connor immediately. Although she was scared like hell she was so happy right now. And she was happy that Carol was there for her earlier. She couldn't have done that alone and having Stevie there, it was a little bit easier for her. Regan couldn't wait to see Connor and share the news with him. She was so much in love with this guy and although they hadn't been together very long, she knew that this was meant forever. All these years she dreamed of a fairytale like Doug and Carol had and now she had her own.

"Connor Smith, please?" she asked the secretary in the big office room and she looked up with a smile. "And you are…" she asked politely but Regan couldn't answer because Connor stormed out of his office.

"Reg! What are you doing here?" He kissed her shortly and smiled at her. "Wanted to surprise you! I've got something to tell you!" Regan answered smiling and Connor knew what this was about. "Let's go into my office then!"

"So? What do you want to tell me?" he asked and hugged her. "I'm pregnant!" Regan answered and laughed a little bit. Connor's eyes lit up and he looked at her with big eyes. "Really? We're having a baby? God, Regan…I love you!" He picked her up and twirled her around, like there would be no tomorrow, happier than ever.


	19. Chapter 19

**AN**: _Next chapter, a little bit boring, but the drama comes back, I promise :D And thanks for the reviews, I really love that there is still somebody who reads my fic 333_

**Chapter 19 – ****Everyday Life**

It was three months after Regan found out about her pregnancy, when Connor proposed to her. It was so romantic, even though Connor didn't plan to take her out or something. It was in the evening, when they were both watching TV, Regan lying in his arms on the couch. And out of the blue he asked her, telling her that he loved her more than anything, that he will be the happiest father in the world, and that he would be happier than ever if she would marry him. Regan didn't even think about her answer and she said yes through her tears of happiness.

The next day, when Connor went to work again, Regan grabbed her cell phone to call Carol. She wanted her to be the first to know about the proposal. Carol picked up the phone giggling. "Carol? What are you doing? Oooh…" Regan murmured, realizing that Doug could be at home. Carol laughed again. "Reg…we're doing nothing, my husband is just silly again!" "I'm not silly! I'm just hungry!" Doug claimed in and Regan chuckled, feeling a little bit awkward catching them in such a moment. "Shall I call later?" she asked. "No, no…it's okay! What's up? How are you?" Carol asked when she got away from Doug, who tried to hold her back. "I'm good…really good!" "Really good? What are you hiding from me?" Carol asked again, realizing that there had to be something more. "Oh Carol!" Regan cried happily, "he proposed!" "He what?" "Connor proposed! And I said yes!" "Oh my God, Regan! That's wonderful! I'm so happy for you both!" "What's going on?" Doug asked, now getting curious. "There's a wedding coming up!" Carol said to him with a smile. "Congrats, Regan!" he called so that Regan would hear it. "Thanks to you both! More details later, I've got to run now!" "Okay, talk to you later! Have fun at work!" Carol said and they both hung up. "Aw, she's so lucky to have Con!" Carol now said, turning to Doug, who was still sitting on the couch. "Yeah, he's a good guy and Regan changed a lot, since she met him. The wild girly is gone…" Doug answered, taking her hand in his. "Yeah…I'm happy for her. They'll be a wonderful little family," Carol answered smiling.

"Hey mum, hey dad!" Tess called when she came back from school. "Hey baby, where's Kate?" Carol asked when she went to the hallway. "Still at school. She had to stay in!" Tess answered, taking off her coat. Carol rolled her eyes. "Oh man…why? What did she do now?" "She had a fight with Jeremy Brooker. He said that in reality she is a boy and then she got mad and then they fought. Sadly, Principal Cohen saw them!" Tess told her mum. "That's my girl!" Doug said who came to them with Stevie on his arm. "Doug! She had a fight with a boy and you say that's your girl?" Carol asked, turning to him. "Well, yeah, I mean, she has to defend herself and if a boy is rude to her, it's her right to fight it!" Doug answered. "I think so too. In reality, Jeremy has a crush on her, but he doesn't want her to know, so he says such things…he's weird!" Tess said and the three went back to the kitchen. "What…he's in love with her?" Carol asked while she prepared dinner for Tess. "Yeah…he's staring at Kate all the time and I saw him smiling at her one time!" Tess answered. Carol looked at Doug with a surprised look. "What can I say…they're Ross girls!" Doug said and shrugged his shoulders with a smile. "With Hathaway curls!" Carol finished and she smiled at Tess too. "I'm really proud of you!" she then said to Tess and hugged her daughter. "But I think we need to talk with Kate. She's losing her temper too quickly!" she said to Doug and he agreed.

"I'LL NEVER GO BACK TO THAT SCHOOL AGAIN!" Kate screamed when she came home and she slammed the door close. "Kate! Are you crazy? Stevie is sleeping!" Doug said who rushed to her immediately. "Stevie, Stevie, Stevie, it's always Stevie!" Without looking back to Doug, Kate disappeared in her room. "Did she really just say that?" Carol asked and Doug nodded. "I'm going to talk to her!" she said and she went upstairs to her daughter.

"What's the problem, sweetie?" Carol asked her little girl when she took a seat on her bad, where Kate was sobbing. Kate didn't answer and didn't turn around. "C'mon, talk to me!" Finally, Kate turned around, her eyes red from crying. "I'm sorry for what I said before, mum!" "I know. You know that I love you and Tess and Stevie all the same…but Stevie is a little baby and she needs more attention than you. You understand that, right?" Carol asked and Kate nodded. "I know, mum…Stevie isn't the problem! That ugly monster Jeremy is!" "Tess already told us about him!" Carol answered, stroking over Kate's curly hair. "He's mean…I hate him!" Kate answered and she started to cry again. "Don't cry, baby. Look at me, please!" So Kate sat up in bed and she looked at her mum. "You're such a beautiful girl. I love your dark eyes and your dark hair, your face is so pretty and I love you. I love you because you are yourself. Don't listen to that Jeremy, because he has no idea, who you are. You need to be proud of yourself, because we're proud of you!" Carol hugged her daughter again, wondering whereto the time went. Her twins were almost 12 years old, sometimes she couldn't believe it. "I love you, mum!" Kate answered and she wiped away her tears. "Ready for dinner?" Carol then asked and Kate nodded. So Carol got up from the bed and went to the door. "Just one thing…" she turned around to Kate again, "I don't want to hear again that you started a fight with somebody!" "He deserved it!" Kate answered angrily and passed her mother to go downstairs. Carol just shook her head and followed her.

"I told you…Jeremy is in love with you!" Tess whispered to her sister, who took a seat beside her. "He's not! He's…he's not!" Kate answered and she threw her fork down on her plate. "Stop saying that! I hate him!" Kate got loud. "Kate! It's enough now, calm down!" Carol said who got dinner ready for her daughter. "Sorry…" Kate murmured, but her mood didn't change. That was Kate and Carol knew that this matter would be nagging on her for at least a week until she would forget it. Kate had always been the trouble maker in the Ross/Hathaway family and this wouldn't change, Carol knew. "We should be happy!" Carol said, putting the plate in front of Kate on the table. "Why should we be happy?" Kate asked with her mouth full. Tess rolled her eyes, not quite understanding why Kate was like this. "Regan will marry Connor!" Tess told her sister with a smile. "Oh…how great, when?" Kate asked rather bored about the news. "After the baby is born. She doesn't want to be a fat bride!" Tess answered and laughed about her own words. Carol rolled her eyes. Okay, her daughters really got more and more adult.

After dinner, Carol got Stevie ready for her monthly visit in the hospital. "Baby…I'm sorry, but you have to wear that hat! Shhhh…" she tried to calm the crying baby down while she put the hat on Stevie's head. "Do you need help?" Kate asked who came out of the kitchen. "Did you finish your homework?" Carol asked and Kate rolled her eyes. "Duh…I already did it in school…don't worry!" the young girl answered and smiled then. Carol shook hear head smiling. "You're a little rascal!" Kate laughed and shrugged her shoulders. The madness from before was gone. "Can I come to the hospital with you two?" she then asked and Carol looked to her. "Of course you can. I'd appreciate some help!" Carol answered and Kate nodded. "Okay then. I'll get my coat!" Kate answered and ran away. "Tess? Will you stay at home?" Carol called into the living room, where Tess was reading a book. "Yeah" was her short answer, so Carol, Stevie and Kate were the only who were going.

"Dad! C'mon, let's play some Wii!" Tess shouted and Doug came into the living room with a grin on his face. "Ooh, what do you have in mind?" Doug asked. "I will defeat you...c'mon, let's try!" Tess answered with an evil grin and they both started to play.

"Carol!" Carol turned around when she heard her name and Regan appeared in front of her. "Aww baby, I'm so happy for you!" Carol put the carrier with Stevie down on the floor and hugged her friend. "Show me that ring!" Regan smiled and showed her hand to Carol. "Wow, beautiful!" Carol said again smiling. "Congrats, Reg!" Kate chimed in and smiled too. "Thanks you two!" Regan answered and hugged both again. "What are you doing here?" "The monthly visit at Jane's with our troublemaker!" Carol smiled and turned the carrier to Regan. Stevie was silently sleeping. "Aww…look at her, she's so cute! Well, I need to go now, see you later?" Regan asked and Carol nodded. "Of course. See you!"

"The blood results are totally okay, she's out of temperature, developing normal…she's a very healthy baby!" Jane said after looking on the lab results and handing back Stevie to Carol. "Did you hear that? Isn't this great?" Carol touched Stevie's nose and smiled. "Stevie's really brave, didn't even cry when you took the blood!" Kate said, very proud of her baby sister. "She is! Do you have fun with her?" Jane asked and Kate nodded. "Sure, but hopefully she sleeps through the night soon, I always wake up when she cries!" Kate answered. Carol smiled and stroke over her head. "I hope so too, believe me! "she said and all three of them laughed.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20 – Crying Concert**

The months got by and Regan got more and more pregnant. She stopped working when she was about six months pregnant but first she had to get used to it, not being at the hospital. So she and Carol visited as often as possible.

"When are you due again?" Carol asked, pouring lemonade into Regan's glass. "Don't ask me that all the time! Look at me, I'm a fat cow!" Regan answered whining and Carol laughed. "I know how you feel, but remember, I had twins!" Carol answered, showing her tongue to her friend when they suddenly heard Stevie through the baby monitor. "Be right back!" Carol said and got up. Only minutes later she came back with a happy smiling Stevie. "Hey Steves! Did you sleep well?" Regan asked and Carol handed the girl to Regan. "Dadada" was all she got back and Regan smiled. "Aww…she's so cute!" "Your boy will be cute too!" Carol answered smiling. "Boy?" Carol nodded. "Yeah, I think you'll get a boy. So, what about the names?" "Well, Connor and I decided about that. If it's a girl, she'll be named Dianna and if it's a boy he'll be named Noah!" Regan answered. "Beautiful names!" Carol said, smiling at her.

And this night was the night. Regan and Connor came rushing into the hospital because Regan was in labor. "Doug! We need help!" Connor shouted and Doug turned around, suddenly smiling. "Is it about time?" he asked, coming to them. "Silly…how does this look to you?" Regan answered with a pain filled face. Doug laughed again. "Okay then, we'll get you up then!" he said, going away to get a wheelchair for his friend.

"Don't forget to breath…everything will be okay!" Doug said when he came back and Regan just rolled her eyes. "Shut up or I'm going to kill you!" she said, already tired of this. She never thought that it would be so hard, not even when Carol told her about everything.

"We got everything ready for you!" Jane waved to them when they arrived upstairs and then everything got really quickly.

After only two hours little Noah Smith arrived. "Beautiful boy, 10 fingers, 10 toes, congratulations to you two!" Doug said, handing back the baby to Regan and kissing her cheek. He really was happy that she finally found someone who loved her and now they were a little family. "Thanks Doug…will you tell Carol about it?" Regan asked and Doug nodded. "You bet I will!" he answered with a smile and then said his goodbyes.

"He's beautiful, isn't he?" Connor said, bending down to his fiancée and son. "He is…I love you, Con!" Regan answered, kissing him with all the love she got. "I love you too!" he then answered, slightly stroking over Noah's head.

The next morning Carol woke up looking straight into Doug's face. "Morning, beautiful!" he said and kissed her. Carol smiled. "Good morning to you too. It's too early to get up!" she answered and closed her eyes again. "But I have some good news!" Doug said with a grin on his face. Carol opened her eyes again, looking to him. "Noah Smith arrived yesterday night!" Doug told her and Carol sat up in bed. "Really? Why didn't you wake me when you came home?" Carol asked surprised, but happy. "You were sleeping so lovely, I didn't want to wake you…" "Oh Doug, that's so wonderful! Is the baby okay? Is Regan okay?" Carol asked, now laying down to him again. "The baby is okay and beautiful, Regan was a monster, and she wanted to kill me!" Doug told her and he chuckled. "Well, don't be mad at her…I'm glad everything turned out okay for them!" Carol answered and she kissed her husband. "I'm glad too!" Doug said, stroking her cheeks. "I love you, Care!" Carol smiled. "I love you, too! Now let me sleep some more minutes!" she answered yawning and soon her eyes were closed again. Doug chuckled, putting his arm around her and closing his eyes too.

When they woke up again they heard giggling and blabbing downstairs. "I think we need to go down and rescue our home!" Carol said, yawning again and sitting up in bed. "I don't think so…C'mere!" Doug smiled, putting her down again so he could kiss her. Carol didn't complain about that but then they got interrupted.

"We made breakfast!" Tess shouted when they came into their room, holding the plates in her hand. "And Stevie's hungry too, I guess!" Kate said who held her little sister. "We already tried to feed her, but she doesn't eat it from us!" she finished and rolled her eyes. Carol and Doug just smiled. "Thank you, girls! Wow, you made pancakes too?" Carol asked, taking a plate from Tess, wondering if the kitchen was still alive down there. "Yeah…like you showed us!" Tess answered proudly. "And they're delicious! Thank you!" Doug said after he tasted one bite of them. "Dada!" Stevie suddenly shouted and everybody laughed. "Someone's getting mad!" Kate said laughing, so Carol got up from bed. "I'm going to make her a bottle…be right back!"

She almost collapsed when she arrived in the kitchen. It was nothing but a mess. "My God, what did they do here?" Carol asked herself while she put some dishes into the dishwasher. "Okay…I think I know what I have to do this morning!" she then said and then finally got ready Stevie's bottle.

Later that day, when the kitchen was clean again and they had dinner, they decided to visit Regan and baby Noah in the hospital. It took about an hour until they all got ready, because Tess and Kate still were in their pajamas and Stevie was all dirty from the eating, but eventually they were all together in the family van and ready to visit Regan.

"Hey guys!" Regan called when they stood in the door. "Aww Reg, congratulations!" Carol smiled and she went in to hug her friend. Also the twins spoke out their congratulations to Regan, but then they only had eyes for little Noah. "Thanks!" Regan answered smiling, looking at her son. "How was it? Will you get a second one?" Carol asked and Doug rolled his eyes. Typical women talk. "It was like hell…but after he was here, all the pain was forgotten, y'know…it's like a wonder!" Regan answered, suddenly wiping away tears from her eyes. "It is! I'm so happy for you! He's beautiful!" Carol said, now looking at the baby closely. "Wanna hold him?" Regan asked, knowing that everybody wanted to hold a newborn baby. "Of course, I thought you'd never ask!" Carol laughed and put up the baby from his crib. Suddenly Stevie started to moan, it was like she was getting jealous because Carol was holding another baby. "Hey…it's okay Steves! It's your new friend, Noah!" Doug tried to calm her down but it was too late. Stevie let out a loud cry and soon the tears were rolling down her cheeks. "Shh…Noah is sleeping!" Carol now said to her daughter but as soon as she had spoken out the words, Noah was crying too. The adults started to laugh at this sound; it was like a crying concert. "Okay, I think we need to change babies!" Carol said, handing Noah to Doug and Doug handing Stevie to Carol. Stevie immediately stopped to cry and she laid her head on Carol's shoulder. Carol smiled. "I think that's the jealous phase right now!" she said to Regan and Regan nodded. "Man, you need to give me so many tips! I'm so new to this!" she said, stroking over Stevie's hair. "It's not that difficult and I know you'll be a great mum!" Doug claimed in, handing Noah now to Regan. "Yeah, just be with him like you were with us and with Stevie!" Tess said who was listening to the conversation. Regan giggled. "Yeah, well, we'll see!" she answered and then kissed her son's forehead. "And now you can start with the wedding plans!" Kate suddenly said with a grin on her face. Doug chuckled. "Wow, yeah, that's true Katie!" Regan smiled and they all laughed.


	21. Chapter 21

**AN:** _Okay, so here it is...1. Drama comes back, 2. this is the second last chapter. Hope you like it!_

**Chapter 21 – Dark Clouds**

Wedding days normally were happy days. Normally.

The day started like every other day…well, except of the wedding stress.

"Get up, kids! Mum already made a big breakfast!" Doug tried to wake up the twins, who were still sleeping like stones in the dark room. "I'm not hungry!" Kate whined. "But we won't get anything to eat until 4 or 5 pm, so we need to eat breakfast! C'mon now!" Doug again said and went in to put up the roller blinds. "DAD! Stop it!" Kate shouted, putting the blanket over her face. "I love you too babies!" Doug chuckled and left the room.

Suddenly, a eleven-months-old Stevie ran to him, trying to speak something indefinable and Doug laughed. "Yeah, you get something to eat, too!" he said, picking her up from the floor and twirling her around.

"Good morning, sweeties!" Carol said when he and Stevie arrived in the kitchen and she kissed Doug. "Good morning to you too!" Doug answered then and put Stevie into the highchair. "Mammaaa!" Stevie cried out and then clapped her hands on the table. "She's such a morning person!" Carol stated, while she put a kiss on Stevie's cheek. "Are the twins up?" Doug shook his head. "Apparently not. It's a mission impossible!" he answered, taking a seat beside Stevie. Carol went to the stairs. "Tess, Kate, get up, STAT!" she shouted and only seconds later her daughters arrived too. "Good morning!" Carol and Doug said but the twins couldn't even look yet. Kate just yawned and poured milk into her muesli, Tess just rubbed her eyes and nibbled on her roll. "Wow, what a great mood you have!" Doug chuckled and Carol rolled her eyes.

"Care! Where's my tie?" Doug shouted from the bedroom. "Where you left it the last time!" she shouted back, already annoyed with the whole morning, while she was bathing Stevie. She needed to take a shower for herself and wash her hair, but she was already late. The twins weren't much help this morning, since they were still tired. "Care? I can't find it…" Doug said silently when he looked into the bathroom. Carol turned around annoyed. "Then look for it, Doug!" Doug was gone as quickly as he arrived. "Mammaaa!" Stevie shouted happily in the water and Carol smiled at her. "Thank God you're still too little for all this!" Carol said, putting foam on Stevie's nose.

"Mum! My dress is dirty!" Kate jumped into the bathroom with her dress on. "What did you do?" Carol asked, picking up Stevie and putting a towel around her. "Nothing! I just put it on!" Kate shrugged. "Doug, come here, please! I need some help!" Carol almost whined and Doug arrived soon. "What's up?" he asked, still without a tie on. "Get Stevie ready, please! Her dress is in her upper drawer!" Carol answered, placing the little girl into Doug's arm. "Okay, now let me see your dress!" Carol said and she knelt down to Kate. There was a little brown stain on her dress, right on the stomach. "Did you eat chocolate?" Carol asked, getting a wet towel to wipe the stain away. "No! I promise! I didn't eat chocolate!" Kate hesitated. "Yeah, right. Since when do we eat chocolate before we had dinner?" Carol asked, taking a deep breath afterwards. "Mum!" Kate complained, but she had no chance. "Okay, I'm sorry. But since we don't get to eat dinner until 5pm, I thought it would be okay…" Carol then smiled at her. She just couldn't be mad at her daughter, not today. "It's okay. See, the stain is gone! But take care now!" Carol said and got up, kissing Kate's cheek. Kate then ran away again.

"Finally time for myself!" Carol sighed and she got ready for her shower.

It felt like a thousand hours later, when Carol was finished with her hair and her make-up. "Not bad…" she murmured, looking into the mirror when Doug arrived. "Can you help me with this?" he asked but then just stared at her. He felt his heart pounding quicker and a smile spread across his face. "You look stunning! I…wow!" was all he could say and Carol smiled. "Thanks baby!" she answered and kissed him, "now let me see this!" She started to make the knot for the tie. "Do you think Regan is nervous?" she asked and Doug shrugged. "I don't know…I'm just happy that she finally found someone after…" but then stopped abruptly. "After what?" Carol asked curiously. "Nothing", Doug tried to end that topic, but now it was too late. "C'mon, after what? Is it such a big secret or why don't you want to tell me?" Carol asked and Doug hesitated. He couldn't tell it to her, not after all these years. He should've told it to her 11 years ago, but now, after they were such good friends with Regan it was just not appropriate. "It's just…man, I can't tell you, Care. Let's forget it, okay?" Doug said, hoping she would be okay with it. "Doug? I thought we could tell us everything?" Doug looked down, kinda worried. "Okay. But please…don't be mad at me or her…" Doug said and Carol closed her eyes. "Did you have an affair with her?" she asked silently but Doug shook his head. "No. I…we kissed. When I came here to Seattle, she was the one who saved my life. And this one night, she came to the bar, telling me that I shouldn't be so unhappy with everything, that I shall move on and then she kissed me", he told her and looked back up to her again. Carol thought that the world was going down for her. She couldn't say a word. She remembered every word Doug just said. So, apparently Regan was in love with her husband and all this years she didn't say a word about this? "I didn't want this, Carol. I didn't love Regan…kissing her felt so wrong…" Doug interrupted her thoughts again. It wasn't the kissing part that Carol didn't like. It was the lying part. Doug, and also Regan lied to her. All these years. She couldn't believe it. When Carol arrived in Seattle, she told him about Luka, about the kisses and she asked him, if he was with someone, too. His answer was no. He looked into her eyes and said no. Regan never said a word about this kiss. Never. "You lied to me", Carol said calmly and went past him, out of the bathroom. Doug sighed. He knew that something like this would happen and it was all his fault. "I'm sorry, Care…" he shouted, but she didn't respond. Great. Now, Regan's wedding day was all full of dark clouds.

The driving to the church went silent. Tess and Kate soon knew that their parents had a fight. It was only Stevie who babbled in the back seat. Carol looked out of the car all the time. This was hurting so much. What would she say to Regan today? Congrats, Reg. Sorry that you didn't get my husband.

Doug looked at Carol and sighed. He knew that this would upset her. But why didn't she understand him? God, he loved her. He stilled loved her so much, didn't that matter at all? All this happened 10 years ago. And he didn't want Regan. He wanted Carol…all the time.

When they arrived at the church, Carol got out of the car without saying a word. "C'mon girls!" she smiled to Tess and Kate and finally got Stevie out of her car seat. "C'mon, let's go inside!" she said to her elder daughters and pushed them to the entrance. "Carol…wait!" Doug called after her, but she didn't turn around.

She was so glad that there were free seats beside Jane and her husband. She was glad, that Jane was here, so she didn't have to talk to Doug now. She just couldn't. Not now. "Hey Jane, Steve!" Carol whispered and got down on the seat with Stevie on her arm. "Hey…now look at her, isn't she adorable?" Jane said, touching Stevie's hand and Carol smiled. "She is, and already started to walk, can you believe that?" Carol answered, kissing Stevie's head. "Wow, she's doing great then, that's great, really!" Jane answered with a smile and Carol nodded. This wasn't going bad, she thought. Well, until later, when she had to congratulate Regan.

Regan arrived at the church with Noah on her arm. The little baby was wearing a white suit and he was sleeping. Carol immediately thought, if Regan wished that this was Doug's baby, but she regretted it soon. She needed to stop thinking that. 10 years went by since then and she was behaving like a stupid teenager girl. Again, she focused on Regan, who looked beautiful. Connor seemed really nervous, as he was waiting for her at the altar. Carol was happy for her best friend, she really was. But deep inside it still hurt. It hurt that she couldn't tell her the truth over all these years. Carol shared all secrets with Regan; they even talked about Carol's sex life. Carol looked down to Stevie, when she noticed that Doug was looking at her.

Why was he so stupid, starting this topic? Was it about time to get out? Was it fate, when he finally blurted out that Regan kissed him? God, why did he have to say it? Everything was so perfect this morning. They were struggling with everything like a happy family and then he had to destroy everything. She must be really hurt. He should've told her in the first place. Now, Regan was getting married and he couldn't even focus on the wedding. All he was thinking about was Carol. He hurt her once again. And he was so sorry about it. He loved her so much. He watched her, playing with their little daughter, smiling at her and all he saw was her beauty. He was so happy with her, still. He loved waking up, feeling her arm around his chest. He loved going to bed with her and watching her fell to sleep. He just loved her with all his heart. But today he ruined everything.

"You may kiss the bride now!" Doug heard the priest and he suddenly looked up again. Regan looked so happy and so did Connor. Noah was still sleeping on Regan's arm, no intend to wake up. And then Regan turned around, smiling and waving to the Ross-Hathaway family. Doug was happy for her. She was a great woman and she deserved a happy life after all. She deserved it.

Carol tried to bring a weak smile on her face, when she saw Regan waving at her. God, who was she kidding? She loved Regan. They grew so close over all the years. She just needed to hear the truth from her.


	22. Chapter 22

**AN: ** _Okay, here it is. The last chapter. Thanks again for all the reviews I got. I hope you all liked my story! It was fun writing it :D Thanks again, love, Sandy 3_

**Chapter 22 – Truth**

The reception was all filled with happiness. Regan almost cried when Carol said her congrats to her. "I'm so happy, Carol. This is the most beautiful day in my life. God, look at him, taking care of our baby!" Regan said when she watched Connor and all she felt was love. Carol nodded, feeling the pain in her heart. "Reg…do you have time to talk in private?" she silently asked, not knowing if this was the right time for it, but it had to be done. Regan immediately saw the concerned look on Carol's face. "Hey…what's up, you should be happy with me!" she laughed and Carol nodded. "I am. I just need to ask you something…"

They went out to the lake, where they took a seat on a bench, watching the ducks swim. "So, what's up?" Regan asked, not knowing anything. "Have you been in love with Doug?" Carol asked quickly, not wanting to stretch it out any longer. "What?" Regan asked surprised. Carol smiled and looked down. "Today he told me that you kissed", Carol said, closing her eyes at this thought. "Oh…" Regan murmured, now knowing exactly what she meant.

"Well…this was so many years ago Care…" Regan started, but Carol interrupted her. "So why couldn't you tell me back then? Why haven't you said anything?" Carol asked, almost near crying. "I'm sorry Carol…really…I…I just couldn't tell you…I mean, Doug was so…depressed, he was lonely and it hurt seeing him like this. And then you came and suddenly he was all happy and you were happy…remember our first meeting?" Regan asked and Carol nodded, wanting to hear more. "I saw you and I knew that you loved him with all your heart. I knew that he loved you, more than anything. I wanted to tell you about the kiss…but you were so happy to be with him. And then…I guess I just forgot about it…it didn't matter anymore. And yes, maybe I was in love with him when he first arrived here, but I soon knew that I had no chance, Carol. He just loved you. And he always will. I'm really sorry Carol. Please forgive me…please. You're my best friend. I love you and I don't want to lose you, Care…I found my love, and I have a baby with my love. The kiss with Doug was just proving to me, that he wasn't my love. I love Connor, more than my life and I love my baby. Please…forgive me, for what I did. Today is my wedding day and I thought that this would be a happy day for all of us." Regan sighed, when she finished, knowing that she hurt her best friend by not telling her about the kiss. But why did Doug tell her about it today?

"Thank you, for being honest. I was really pissed this morning, y'know…" Carol answered, now smiling and shaking her head. "Now that you say it…I'd be pissed too…I'm sorry, Care!" Regan said again, now taking Carol's hand. Regan loved Carol like a sister. They grew so close over all these years and she never wanted to miss her again. "It's okay. Just…just don't do it ever again!" Carol laughed and Regan nodded. "I promise!" Then Carol hugged her. "Congrats on the beautiful wedding again…I'm really happy for you!" she finally said and now Regan couldn't hold back her tears of happiness anymore. "Thanks…now you ruined my make-up!" she laughed trough her tears and Carol shook her head laughing.

Doug watched all this, while holding Stevie and trying to calm her down. 'Of course', he thought. 'Now she's all happy with Regan again and I'm still the ass.'

"Dad!" Kate said and interrupted his thoughts when she ran to him. "What's up?" he asked, putting Stevie into the high chair again. "I think I broke my arm!" Kate answered, showing her arm to him. Doug chuckled. "Remember when you broke your arm when you were a little kid?" he asked and Kate shook her head. "Well, you screamed because of the pain. And now you're standing here, smiling at me…it doesn't look like you broke your arm!" he answered and touched Kate's arm, just to be sure, but then she winced because of pain. "Oh, what's that?" he asked concerned. "It hurts, dad! It really hurts!" Kate said, now near tears. "What did you do?" her dad asked again. "I was climbing on that fence over there with Tess and that boy and I fell!" Kate told him, now almost jumping on her feet. "Well, I guess we need to drive to the hospital then!" Doug said and he got up to look after Carol again. "Sorry to ruin the wedding…" Kate murmured. "No problem, sweet. I just want you to be okay!" he answered, smiling at her.

After some minutes Doug found Carol talking and smiling with some other guests. "Hey, Care…" he said and she looked at him. "I'm driving to the hospital with Kate. I think she has a broken arm!" he told her and she made big eyes. "My God, what did she do?" Carol asked. "She was climbing a fence and fell…will you look after Tess and Stevie?" Doug answered and Carol nodded. "Of course…unless you want me to come!" she answered but Doug shook his head. "Nah…it's okay, you stay here, have fun…I'm going with Kate. I'll just say bye to Reg and Connor…see you at home then!" he said and thought about kissing her, but he stopped right there. They still didn't talk and so he thought a kiss would be inappropriate. So Carol just nodded and went with him to her baby daughter.

"Katie! What did you do again?" Carol asked the girl, who was already crying silent tears now. "I fell…and now my hand hurts like hell!" Kate answered madly. "It's going to be okay. I love you, baby!" Carol said, hugging her gently. "Love you too, mum!" Kate answered.

"Can I come too? It's kinda boring here…" Tess now said, coming to their table. Carol knew that the kids would want to go home after some hours because of boredom. "Doug?" Carol asked him and he looked at her. "Yeah, of course she can come. No problem!" he answered with a smile and Carol nodded.

So the three said their good-byes to Regan and Connor and soon they were on the way to the hospital. Great, Carol thought. What a day.

"Bored?" Regan asked who came to the table and took a seat beside Carol. "No…not really, Steve's giving me a great company here!" Carol answered smiling and Regan nodded. "Not your day, huh?" Regan asked again and Carol nodded. "I'm sorry…for everything today!" "Hey!" Regan said and Carol looked to her again. "It was the most beautiful day in my life. Don't be sorry…I just hope Kate's gonna be okay!"

Carol smiled again. "She will…she's rough and I think this wasn't her last broken arm!" she now laughed and Regan nodded. "Yeah, she's the wild kid!"

It was two hours later when Doug, Tess and Kate arrived at home. "You okay?" Doug asked Kate and she nodded. "Yeah…I really like this green cast!" she answered, looking at her arm again. "Why did you get a colored cast? Now I can't paint on it!" Tess murmured but Kate shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know…" she just said yawning.

"Hey…wanna watch another wedding now? And eat some ice cream?" Doug asked his two daughters. "Your wedding?" Tess asked and Doug nodded. "Why not!" she said and Kate was okay with it too. So Doug put the cassette into the player and then took place on the couch between Tess and Kate.

Stevie got really fussy already and Carol had a hard time to calm her down. She was trying to entertain the baby, but Stevie just cried. "I think she wants her bed…I better go home with her!" she said and Regan nodded. "Yeah…it's late already, Noah's sleeping for hours now!" Regan answered, looking over to her baby who was sleeping in the stroller. "Good kid!" Carol answered and then Regan got up. "Thanks for everything!" she said and hugged Carol. "You're welcome. Thanks for the talk today. And…I wish you a good night for later!" Carol laughed and Regan punched her arm. "Care! What do you think? I'll be too tired for anything!" "But I won't be!" Connor interrupted the two women and all three had to laugh. "Well then, good luck! Bye!" Carol hugged Connor too and then put Stevie in her stroller. "See you soon! Bye all!" Carol waved to all the other guests who were still there and then made her way home.

It was good to take a walk after sitting all day and the fresh air did well too. Stevie fell asleep immediately, beaten from the whole day and Carol thought about Doug. It was stupid how she behave today. Just stupid. She remembered what they went through all those years, what he did for her. Then she started to hate herself for being so selfish the whole day. She loved him, she always did and she never doubted his love for her. He could've gone for Regan, he had the chance, but he waited for her.

Carol took a deep breath and smiled then. She would always choose him, no matter what. Always.

When she arrived at home, she silently opened the door to the house, picking sleeping Stevie up from the stroller. She went inside and then she found him on the couch, left from him a sleeping Kate with a cast on her arm, right from him a sleeping Tess and he didn't notice Carol, who was standing now at the entrance to the living room. She listened to his words and fell in love with him over and over again.

"I don't like fighting with your mum…I don't like fighting at all, she always wins. I can't even be mad at her, I mean…just look at her, her laugh, her smile, I love it. I love your mum. When she came down that aisle, wearing that beach dress, holding you little cuties on the hands…I felt like we four were the only people in the world. I felt so much love for her…and…I never want to hurt her again. I…I love you guys…I really do…"

Carol stepped in front of him and she smiled at him, bending down and touching his knee with her free hand. "We should bring them all to bed!" she whispered and then got up a little to kiss him on his cheek. He knew then, that everything was okay. He got up too, looking at the twins. "Her arm really was broken!" he said and Carol nodded. "Poor girl…she's more a troublemaker than Stevie is!" Carol smiled. "She sure is! I'll bring them upstairs!" he said and picked up Kate first. Carol stayed with Tess in the meantime, taking a seat on the couch and laying Stevie on her chest. Everything was okay.

When both Tess and Kate were in their beds and Stevie was in her crib, Carol finally slipped under the blanket to Doug, kissing him again. "I'm sorry for today. I get why you didn't tell me about Regan and…I love you, Doug. I love you, no matter what. Sorry that I've been such a jerk!" she said and she really was sorry for everything. Doug just smiled at her. "You're not a jerk. And now make love to me!" Doug answered and Carol laughed, happy to be with him. She kissed him then and they made love with a new found passion.

"Are we okay?" Doug asked afterwards. "For now…" Carol answered with a smile and both knew that everything was okay.

**THE END  
**


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